#she said yes and confirmed that i was still attracted to men

[starryalpacasstuff]

Knock Knock Boys: A Queer Asian Lens

I didn't watch Knock Knock Boys as it was airing, because it didn't really seem like the kind of show I'd be into. However, this post by @lurkingshan and @waitmyturtles' enthusiastic recommendation convinced me to give it a shot. Having binged the entirety of the series in a day, I can say that the show was an absolute delight to watch.

I've seen plenty of people talking about how wonderfully sex positive the show was, so I'm not going to bother with going too much into it, but I will say that the drama clearly showed the kind of sex education and awareness that is desperately needed around the world. I also really liked how Lukpeach and Latte were the ones responsible for pretty much all of the sex education in the show. It was very realistic in that, in my experience, it's extremely common for teenagers and young adults to get a majority of their knowledge about sex from their friends and the internet. The show had a very clear message about the importance of talking freely about sex with younger generations, because the taboo on the topic only harms teenagers in the long run.

Now, besides that, there was one more issue that I thought the show did wonderfully: it showed how asian kids are often hesitant to discuss things with their parents because they assume the worst in the beginning. I'm having some trouble articulating this, because it's such an abstract, ingrained concept to me, so forgive me if this is incoherent. I'm also generalizing my experience as an Indian, so please do correct me if I'm wrong here. That being said, having been raised in a society that values respect and listening to elders without question, discussing alternate ideas with parents can be a very difficult thing for most of us. It's easy to assume what parents would say to an idea and decide that trying to convince them otherwise is a task that is either futile or requires too much energy.

The best way I can describe is that the mindset becomes "It's better to ask for forgiveness if you get caught instead of asking for permission straight away". For example, had Almond asked his mother if he could stay with three other guys, she would've most definitely flat out refused, since she would've had a lot of preconceived notions about the idea. But, because Almond is able to show her that he's happy as he was, she was perfectly fine with him continuing to stay with the others. I think that's the hallmark of most asian parents, they want us to be happy but they're convinced that they know what kind of life will make us happy. They did something similar with Peak and his father, but my feelings on that are a little more complex, so we'll come back to this.

Peak and Thanwa, man. I loved Latte and Almond but these two just stole the show for me. I know some people felt frustrated with Peak's dallying and hesitance, but I just felt so sad for him, and something about his situation just hit very close to home. And Seng, the actor that he is. One particular moment that stuck with me was the scene when he leaned against the door while Jumper attacked Max. I must've rewatched that moment half a dozen times, because his acting was impeccable. I will say, I wish that they'd given us a better resolution on the arc after Max, but those are mostly minor quibbles. What I really wanted to talk about was the arc with Peak's father. Peak gathering the courage to tell his father with the support from his found family was beautiful. The scene at Knock Knock House the day before Peak left was one of the most magnificent, emotionally charged scenes I've seen in asian ql in a while. Coming from a societ wherein arranged marriage is the norm, the storyline hit hard in all the right places.

But. I did not love the resolution of the arc. I think we've had some conversation about how some shows try to be both in the bubble and out of the bubble simultaneously, and the last two episodes of the show felt a little like that. From what we knew about the father, it felt almost too easy for him to simply accept everything right away. There should have been some struggle for reconciliation. I know that the show has a theme of assumptions and lack of communication disrupting parent-child relationships, but in this case how fast they move on just seems unrealistic. My cynicism aside, even if we assume that the father wasn't homophobic, there should've been more of a conversation on the breaking of the engagement! The social implications, the father asking him why he didn't say anything for so long, Jane's involvement (how did the father know that she knew about this?). The only argument I can see against this is that the father, while initially put off by the revelation, chose to act otherwise to support his son. But then, he most likely wouldn't have insisted they take his car. And there still should've been some sort of a conversation about the engagement. Arranged marriages have a purpose; it's to provide financial and social security. I find it extremely hard to believe that a father who arranged a marriage for his son wouldn't have so much as discuss the implications of being gay with him. They tried to have the engagement have consequences with the wedding banquet, but the resolution for that really only made it worse. This is cynical of me, but I simply cannot suspend my disbelief enough to believe that the entire wedding party was perfectly happy with the turn of events. This whole resolution just seemed out of place in a show that was otherwise so wonderfully grounded in reality while still being absolutely hilarious. I think, if the show had done something a little more similar to GAP, it would've felt more realistic.

All of that aside, I really did enjoy watching the show. It was hilarious and heartwarming, and the characters were absolutely wonderful. The resolution of the final arc did drag it down a little, but I would be lying if I said that watching two queer couples get to celebrate their relationships with their community didn't warm my heart at all (Also, side note- Jane having a girlfriend was a brilliant subversion). All in all, it's a great series. It definitely felt like something new and fresh compared to the kind of qls that I've been watching lately.

[lewisvinga]

no me importa | lewis hamilton x fem! reader

summary; when a recent video exposes y/n and lewis’ relationship, other people think they can comment on their age gap, but at the end of the day y/n and lewis will always love each other

fc; cindy kimberly

warnings; age gap , mentions of 18+ themes

notes; loosely based off of mayor que yo by wisin & yandel and mayor que usted by natti natasha, daddy yankee, wisin & yandel :p , also reader is kinda implied as latina but it’s not important

me 🤝 writing smau’s abt dating older men

masterlist !

liked by lewishamilton, lilymhe, and 1,020,047 others!

yourusername: made vegan alfredo for me n bae, definitely went into a food coma after

tagged; lewishamilton, roscoelovescoco

lewishamilton: wifey material

yourusername: yes i do the cooking yes i do the cleaning 🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️

lewishamilton: it was amazing, love ❤️

yourusername: i put my blood sweat n tears into that alfredo, it better have been damn well amazing😕 ( thank u love💗💗)

username: so this is a confirmation?

username: girl did u not see the video, they were shoving their tongue down each others throat ???😦😦

username: cute but age gap is still icky to me 😕

username: tbh dating someone 13 years older than me is weird asf 😭

rosecoelovescoco: thank’s you’s

yourusername: ur welcome if u stop chasing lunita around 😕

lewishamilton: he is just a baby!

yourusername: so is my gatita lunita , she’s a scaredy cat , literally !!😞

username: she’s so pretty in everything what😞

username: 😍😍😍

lilymhe: cook for me next? 😏😏

yourusername: give me the time n place😉

username: ok but her learning how to make vegan pasta for lewis?? is so??? cute ????🥹🥹

username: he’s a grown man n 13 years older, he can cook for himself

username: it’s never that serious

liked by username, username, and 93,038 others!

f1upadates: Lewis Hamilton and Y/n L/n were both spotted at the British Fashion Awards after confirming their relationship. Thoughts on the new grid couple?

tagged; lewishamilton, yourusername

username: the fact she designed her outfit n did her hair and makeup 😩🙌

username: they’re such a good looking couple even if he’s like 13 years older than her 😭

username: i need her skincare routine!😩

username: be 13 years younger than your boyfriend helps!

username: she’s so desperate that she needs to date someone older than her? how embarrassing 💀💀

username: her parents must be so disappointed…

username: why? shes a model w her own fashion line dating a 7x (8x) world champion, they’ll be fine😭

username: y’all coming at her for dating someone older like you wouldn’t date your faves who are also older!! she’s just living the y/n life

username: REAL

yourusername posted to their story!

trans. for lyrics ; and i don’t care if i’m younger than you

liked by yourusername, georgerussell63, and 1,230,937 others!

lewishamilton: heard she likes señores [sirs]

tagged; yourusername

yourusername: sir lewis hamilton 🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️

landonorris: i can’t take you calling him sir every 5 seconds pls stop i beg

georgerussell63: ‘yes, sir’ THERE ARE CHILDREN HERE ( lando )

landonorris: wait-

yourusername: sorry not sorry, unless you’re a sir you wouldn’t get it 😁

lewishamilton: what she said😁

yourusername: mi amor, te quiero 💗 [my love, i love you]

lewishamilton: i love you🩷

username: idk if i want him or her tbh🙇‍♀️🙇‍♀️

username: she’s so😍😍

username: i’d call him sir any day i get her fr

username: they’re such an attractive couple😩

username: how’d lewis bag her im being so fr

username: bc they’re both fine as fuck 😍

username: mis padres [my parents]

username: mami y papi fr [mommy & daddy]

liked by lewishamilton, lilymhe, and 1,023,044 others!

yourusername: no me importa q usted sea mayor q yo. [i don’t care if you’re older than me]

tagged; lewishamilton

lewishamilton: wait, when did you take the second picture?

yourusername: baby i got a whole folder of those type of pictures, i take them every chance i get

username: SHARE W THE PUBLIC HELLO??

yourusername: y/n.jpg but it’s just pics of lewis’ back

lewishamilton: i love you❤️

yourusername: i love youuuu💗

username: the hand pics i’m going insane 😵‍💫🥴

username: ou that back pic, i’m going ferallll

lilymhe: omg bae stop posting pics of me 🙈🙈🙈

yourusername: ur too cute my bad😪

lewishamilton: stop stealing my gf

alex_albon: gf stealer !

username: the 3rd pic🥹🥹

username: yall need a third??

username: i can take them both ( not in a fight )

georgerussell63: if only he could look at me like he looked at u in the last picture 🕊️🕊️🕊️

lewishamilton: i will if you look like y/n

yourusername: my bad i’m too cute 😁

carmenmmundt: merc double dates now??

yourusername: uh duh, merc wags stick together 🫶

[thegreymoon]

Mo Ran is so gay it isn't even funny.

Now, this is just my opinion and I realise other people have their own interpretations, but this whole episode is super telling to me of just how unreliable his narration is about having tons and tons of sex with people of both genders in his previous lifetime. He's just so... oblivious. None of this reads as a man with a lot of previous experience with many different people. He did not pick up on her flirting with him at all. Sure, he did have a lot of insane sex in his past life, but as the book unfolds, it becomes very clear that most of that sex was with Chu Wanning. At best, there were only a handful of other people he was involved with, and one was a prostitute he was paying, while the other was his wife whose relationship with him was also transactional.

I know people argue that he is bisexual because he married Song Qiutong, but when we actually get her POV on their marriage, it turns out that they had unenjoyable sex only a handful of times, at least one of which was him taking her from behind and very much imagining that it was Chu Wanning in her place. There are plenty of gay men who end up married to straight women (and vice versa) for whatever reasons and none of this makes them any less gay. He also identifies as a 'cut-sleeve' himself at one point, so he doesn't seem at all confused about his sexual attraction to men. Later on, when we finally get his unaltered POV on his life in the brothel, it comes out that he considered the girls there as sisters at best, never as sexual partners. The only other named sexual partner is Rong Jiu, who is male, and I can buy that there were possibly other people who looked like Shi Mei that he was with under the influence of the cursed love spell, but there was never any real attraction there, which is why some argue that he is attracted only to Chu Wanning and would still be attracted to him regardless of gender.

But I think that this is also not true. He definitely was obsessed with Chu Wanning from an early age, which makes it hard to see what his preferences would have been if Chu Wanning wasn't in the picture, but that chapter when he finally realises his feelings also reveals that he does have a type, which he never dared to think about before because he thought he was unworthy of having a choice. However, Chu Wanning fits this type to a tee, so it's easy to run away with the idea that he is shizunsexual and that Mo Ran's attraction begins and ends with him.

With that said, we do get confirmation later on that he does find other men attractive, in particular, Jiang Xi. It's just that he never has the space or the inclination to do anything about it because of his preoccupation with Chu Wanning. In the extras, when Mo Ran misunderstands Xue Men's relationship with Jiang Xi and thinks they are having a love affair, in his unfiltered Taxian-jun state, he is full of approval because he personally finds these powerful, beautiful, prickly, emotionally unavailable older men to be the height of attractiveness. If Chu Wanning hadn't been in the picture, Mo Ran would have definitely been attracted to Jiang Xi or someone similar. Even Ye Wangxi, whom he also fixates on, fits this type (except for the older man bit because I understood her to be only a few years older than Mo Ran). The fact that she turns out to be a woman also cannot be used as an argument for Mo Ran's bisexuality because she very much presents as a man throughout the book (but whether or not she actually identifies as one is debatable).

In short, Mo Ran does have a type of man he is attracted to and it is definitely men that he likes, regardless of his few dubious and very unsatisfying dalliances with women. While Chu Wanning definitely fits this type of ideal man, there are other men out there whom Mo Ran finds attractive too, it's just that he is too unhinged about Chu Wanning to actually do anything about it. Also, I very much doubt that Mo Ran was nearly as promiscuous as he makes himself out to be because he reads as very oblivious when it comes to sexual relationships in general. Even with Chu Wanning, who was right there and about to pass away from sheer horniness that he couldn't even begin to disguise, Mo Ran was still going, "Shizun is so pure and virtuous!" 🙄

(I'm not going to get into the whole Shi Mei situation and how badly he misread him every step of the way too, but that is because his brain was so badly mangled by him that he really stood no chance on that front until it was entirely too late.)

[angieblogging]

can we talk about the fact that even when a character is canonically/confirmed aroace there will still be allo romance and allo sex/smut written by them? *rant below*

yes aros can date and aces can have sex, but have it ever occurred to the allos that maybe repulsed aroaces or those who don’t want to date or fuck or even allos who don’t want to do those activities deserve to be represented and respected in media?

It will always be „it’s not confirmed!” „comics/og piece of media isn’t the new piece of media!”, but the moment it is confirmed it’s always „they could be *insert any aro/ace spec identity that feels romantic/sexual attraction.” or „but aros can date!” „aces can have sex!” „qprs exists!”

The point is people who say that mainly like 99% of them are allos, straight, bi, gay, lesbian, they’re still allos, they’re allos and they don’t understand how it works, so they write aroaces in romantic and/or sexual relationships where they portray them as allo, they write qprs, as a romantic/sexual relationship, while not fully understanding what a qpr or how such relationships are navigated, they don’t understand that a repulsed aromantic wouldn’t date, because dating implies romance and how does one that’s uncomfortable with it would engage in it? same thing goes for repulsed asexuals.

it hurts that people will always find a way to excuse ship an aro/ace character, to erase my sexuality, it feels like that one time i talked with my mother and she told me that whatever i choose to do when it comes to dating is up to me, that she will accept me no matter if i date men or women and i felt a spark od hope so i asked what if i won’t date anyone? to which she said i will, cause everyone eventually does.

they don’t care that by saying all those things they’re hurting actual people, aros who don’t want to date, aces who don’t want to have sex, allos who don’t want to have those relationships as well or even those who don’t want qprs, as no qprs are not to replace romance for aros or sexual relationships for aces.

[thefanboyhub]

More random HeadCannons for the SBG gang because yes:

Aiden has two different music tastes. The goofy kind (party rocks for example) and then the "oh shit, he's depressed" kind. Think Pierce The Veil, Melanie Martinez, Get Scared, any kind of "I'm fucked up" kind of music.

Ashlyn listens to a lot of classical and instrumental music or like indie alternative kind of stuff. Think James Marriott, Fish in a Birdcage, ECT.

Tyler listens to guitar heavy stuff (like I said last time I did this shit) but he really likes rock/metal kind of stuff. Think Get Scared, Limp Bizkit, Three days Grace, Pierce The Veil, that kind of stuff.

Taylor listens to more upbeat things. She also likes classic pop (Gwen Stacy, Shakira, ECT.) Think Britney Spears.

Ben listens to everything and anything. It depends on his mood how much energy he has the vibes he feels ECT.

Logan shockingly listens to rock. He'll say he's a Fish In a Birdcage girly (which he is but he likes Get Scared and Nickelback more) but he is lying. He wants that head bangers that drown out everything while he zooms into shit.

Tyler would be the worst with road rage when driving.

Logan would be the most normal about driving.

Taylor would be scared at first and relax afterwards while Ben is not relaxed and generally hates driving.

Aiden is shockingly the best driver???

Ashlyn is actually decent at driving when a giant monster isn't trying to kill her and her friends.

Tayler tried to become friends with Ashlyn when they were little but it uh... Failed.

Creator has confirmed Ashlyn is autistic and has kind of said Logan has OCD and Aiden has ADHD I believe. I would like to add to this by saying: Ashlyns autism is more on the social aspect, less on the texture and touch, and HEAVY on sound aspect. Logan's OCD gets worse the more stressed he is, his obsession is intrusive thoughts and the need to be perfect at anything academic, his compulsion is auto cannibalism(chewing not his nails but the skin around them, his lips, inside his mouth, and time took a tiny chunk out his hand) and finding work to do. Aiden's ADHD is very low in the aggression and anger, he does still have it but his ADHD is more on the social and focus stuff. Aiden also has an adrenaline addiction and depression. He also has an addictive personality.

Taylor and Tyler are intersex. It's only on the hormonal level but it's still there. (Do you see the vision???)

Ben hates that he's mute. He does and doesn't have a choice in it. He wants to speak often but something just stops him, it's like a part of him has his hands around his throat just like the day he lost his voice.

Logan is actually really competitive but it has to be something he's good at to really get him going. Tyler found that out during trivia game in the back of one of these classes (they decided to not pay attention and okay a random Kahoot. Logan won.)

It is also confirmed Tyler would be in cosmetology if it want for the scholarship baseball gives him. SO. He dyes Aiden hair, he and Taylor has dyed purple hair at one point. He knows how to do piercings, he did his and his sisters. He has more than her (nose and all ear pericings possible).

None of the group is hetero. None. Ashlyn is the closest to it and that's just cuz she's be Demiromantic and heterosexual. Ben comes in second place for that and that because he's bi but female leaning cuz men scare him. (He be the opposite of most people lmao) Aiden is Pan but doesn't really understand it. Tayler is unlabeled cuz she just likes whoever the fuck. Tyler is a literal raging Bi but doesnt think about it cuz he be busy. And Logan is most likely gay or that one thing that's attracted to like masculinity.

Remember that one scene of Ashlyn popping her bones? Tyler has that when he wakes up in the mornings. He does sports. He gonna snap crackle pop.

Aiden has only had four hospital visits before, he actually more careful then people give him credit for. That and Ben stops him a lot.

Ben sticks closer to Aiden even more now because he heard and saw him die.

Aiden and Ben's sister bully each other.

Tyler once had someone ask him out randomly and he was so confused so he was like "Uhm... No? I think?" Because he was up late trying to help his mom pay bills the night before and didn't understand what she said. The baseball team would not stop bullying him for that the rest of their freshman year.

Taylor had an emo phase in middle school which made Tyler follow suit. They were emos in middle school, I know they were. The hair says it all.

The group has two sets of matching outfits that they wear randomly and somehow always wear on the same days without even communicating it. S

Ashlyn becomes a big baby on her period and me willingly let's Adien and or Tyler carry her around. Taylor just gets really mean and aggressive (becomes Tyler 2.0 frfr) or just cries randomly and it stresses our boys out.

Ashlyn knows baby sign language so she can understand some stuff Ben says to Aiden when they us ASL thinking the group isn't paying attention.

Logan writes fanfiction. I'm not elaborating.

Tyler and Taylor both were princesses one holloween and literally everyone thought they was a third one, making them triplets. People from their middle school that go to their current school still ask if their other sister is doing okay and Tyler dies inside a little every time.

Tyler hates mayonnaise. I feel like he'd hate it.

Ashlyn hates Tartar sauce. Like she will punch anyone who tries to give it to her.

Aiden forgets to eat a lot and has to eat timers to remember.

They all share clothes but Aiden and Ashlyn share more than everyone else. Specifically with each other. They trade a lot.

Logan is constantly missing his sweaters because of Ashlyn stealing them.

They all signed each other shoes on the inner left ones with their initials.

Ben tried not to stick out as much as possible because of trauma.

Logan is edging into his emo phase soon. He'd be the fancy emo, more like and e boy but less cringe.

Aiden worships Lady Gaga. No further explanation.

Everyone gives Aiden the side eye when he plays party rockers (party walkers). He just vibes. (He's actually trying to keep the memory of Ashlyn face in his brain so he doesn't fail her again.)

Taylor has a middle school relationship with a girl one time. It ended cuz she moved away and Taylor was like a sad puppy for two weeks.

That's all bye now

[justrainandcoffee]

The traitor

Prev. || Masterlist

Summary: The eldest son of Jared I Stark, and the night that the young wolf was separated from the pack.

Warnings: Homosexuality and homophobia. Death.

Words: 700 || Once again, remember that these are just blurbs that show what the different characters did before the war. And how their actions are going to affect that war in the future.

He always liked men. Even as kid, Jared II Stark knew that girls, their long hair and elegant mannerisms and gracious smile weren't something he'd find attractive. The soldiers and knights his father commanded, on the other hand...

But he also knew that his father wanted more Starks, Jared's own chidren especially healthy boys, but men couldn't provide that.

He heard his father talking to his council about a possible alliance with the Reach. Lord Tyrell had a girl two years younger than him, barely starting to be a woman but perfectly suitable to be a wife in two or three years. Jared I, said that once she was old enough they'd have two or three new Starks running around Winterfell.

But the idea of having sex with a woman to create a new life disgusted him. His brothers like women, he knew that. The youngest one, Jay, often murmured about marrying some girl probably from the North. James, the second brother, was quieter about his preferences but once Jared saw him kissing a maid.

But Jared was different. He liked men and was perfectly comfortable with that, even if he couldn't say it to anyone.

Willard was his name. 'Will, the strong' the rest of the men called him. Willard Blackwood was 18 years old, was tall and his laughing could be heard around Winterfell every night. He was there to be part of the knights the Stark have and something he consider an honour.

Not even Jared knew how everything started but one day was looking at him and the other was kissing him. That was the final confirmation he needed to completely understand himself. During the cold and darkest nights, both boys enjoyed the mutual company. And for some months it became a tradition to find a moment to see each other.

Until his father found them. Darkblood, his sword was in his hand and the fire illuminating the way reflected on the blade. Someone told him and it was true. His firstborn and one of his knights were in a dark hallway.

Darkblood did its job. Willard's head was now near his lover's feet who was trying to understand what was happening. He was covered in Will's blood but his lips were still warm for his kisses.

"You're a disgrace," his father's voice was colder than the weather. "I should kill you."

"Then kill me," his eyes were full of tears but if someone didn't fear Lord Stark that was Jared.

"The Gods don't want that. But don't tempt me. You're not my son. You're a demon using my boy's skin. I should've known that you were going to disappoint me. You're nothing, you-"

"And you're too coward. You think you look like a fearless man and you love the fear you cause in my brothers. You love that they respect you. But I have news for you, I'm not them. I can see your soul, father, you're the same scared boy that was humiliated by his brother his whole life, aren't you? Yes, afraid of a stag in the forests? Did you pee yourself, father? You're older but you're the same pathetic boy you always was."

Lord Stark put his sword on his son's neck and pressed it against his skin. "History will remember this day as the day I spared a life just for the pleasure of seeing that person suffering the rest of their miserable existence in the Wall."

Screams from servants seeing the decapitated knight woke up the rest of the family. His mother and his brothers were looking at them while father and son were staring at each other with pure hatred.

"Get the fuck out of my sight."

He barely had time to say his brother James to stay strong for the things that were going to happen to him now that he wasn't going to be there. He didn't looked at his mother.

His heavy cape moved in the wind as he was riding to his future home: The Wall. Tears were burning his eyes. Willard deserved better.

Now, five years later he was the captain of the Night Watch. His men respected him and he was a kind leader.

Yet, his heart screamed revenge.

It's night and he's dreaming. He sees his father killing Willard once again. Only that this time he sees himself using his sword against the head of the North.

Jared opened his eyes. Now he knew what he needed to do. And he was ready for it.

He turned around in bed and looked the dark sky through his window. It was snowing. Winter is coming, he thought.

Next

Happy that a little more people know Jared. In my fics he's paired with Tommy. He's an openly homosexual irish gangster that committed patricide 👀.

@mischievouslittlecreature @peakyswritings @call-sign-shark @cillmequick @evita-shelby @hoodeddreams13 @darklydeliciousdesires @shelbydelrey

[archer-kacey]

Joey Drew is Gay and there's no way around it (Pt 5)

So what about the women in Joey's life? Well, we hear a fair amount about two women in particular- Lottie, and Abby Lambert.

First, there's Lottie, a telecommunications girl who befriends Joey. She takes a quick liking to him, but Joey seems to have an aversion to any displays of affection she shows him.

In fact, he claims to "not have time for girls" in general, and this seems to be his reasoning behind not pursuing Lottie romantically.

Immediately following this...watertight explanation, Joey goes on a little side quest. See, Lottie notices odd initials on his boots:

She goes on a long search to find the previous owner, updating Joey with her findings often. However, she gets very down on herself when the effort seems to lead to nowhere, and grows weary as many of the men she's been sending messages to are continuously reported dead.

Note how Joey responds to her more somber attitude as the days go on:

He creates an elaborate lie in order to "solve" the mystery, entertain her, and spare her some of the pain of her depression.

It seems the "I don't have time and I'm too selfish" excuse doesn't really hold up. How odd, I was quite sure Joey Drew was being honest and introspective here.

This story gets even weirder, though. Nathan points out via footnote that he couldn't ever find the correspondences between Joey and Lottie- so the legitimacy of this tale is immediately called into question.

If it is completely fabricated, then Joey literally made up a story in which he keeps 99 feet away at all times from an extremely attractive and sweet woman who was very interested in him. If this is the case, it also seems to be some hardcore fishing for cool guy points. Joey comes out looking like a saint, AND he doesn't actually have to go out and catch girl cooties.

This brings us to the end of Lottie's tale, so let's talk about the (only?) confirmed real woman friend of Joey's.

Abby Lambert is the initial artist friend that introduced Joey to Henry. She seems to be his closest woman friend and confidant, and he ends up trusting her to run the art department as a whole.

Notice both her and Joey's reaction when she invites him as her date to an art salon.

In the middle of the skit they perform at said art salon, Joey takes a second to emphasize that they were just friends- an already stated fact.

It's all fake, but even during something so simple, he still makes it a point to clarify that they aren't involved romantically in any way.

If Abby and Lottie are anything to go by, he has a weirdly hypervigilant attitude when it comes to romance with women.

Regarding Abby specifically, here's more food for thought.

While not outright stated, Abby is very queer-coded herself. She's outside the "norm" for women at the time, both in wardrobe choice and attitude. She has a commanding presence, a streak of "rude" humor, and seems to be uncomfortable in dresses, preferring not to wear them at all if she can help it.

While there is no outright confirmation of her sexuality or identity, she sits outside the strict male/female roles of American society at the time.

This has no bearing on Joey's sexuality in a direct sense, but it still does beg the question: could there be a reason why Joey felt more comfortable around a woman who was not as rigid in her gender presentation? He doesn't seem to care that she wears men's suits, in fact he seems to be drawn towards her differences rather than repelled by them.

Even if there is no gaydar involved in how they found each other, there is a marked difference between the women Joey keeps close (Abby), versus the women Joey does not keep so close (Lottie.)

Now, to attempt to end this juggernaut. How about I cram in some odds and ends in the final part? Because yes, believe it or not, there's STILL MORE.

Part 6>

[mooseyspooky]

I simply love love love your page (as a huge Smiths & especially Marrissey fan) and wanted to ask some questions I hope you don't mind me asking! ♡

○ Sorry if this is overasked, but do you think that the truth about Morrissey and Johnny will ever be revealed? Apparently, Johnny said there is more about the band's breakup than we currently know, and we'll find out at the end or something, whatever that means, lol? Also, Bernard's comment on a member (who we can all probably presume to be Mozzer) 'traumatised' Johnny is strange too...

○ Why do you think Johnny's style changed so much (looking at you Electronic lol) following the split? He was much more...gender non-conforming-ish in terms of hair/makeup/etc. in The Smiths and was comfortable emulating the more feminine looks of his favourite girl groups but suddenly went full on urban masc in Electronic. I know personal styles change, especially when you go from band to band (and perhaps it was kinda agreed with Bernard for the group's aesthetic), but it makes me wonder if he maybe wanted to distance himself from that era - the era where he may have had something a little more than friendship with Morrissey...

○ And finally (Apologies for this being so verbose), my partner and I were discussing Marrissey today and came up with the following theory and as huge fans of your blog we had to ask your opinion lol: Morrissey and Johnny were mutually attracted/into each other, but in different ways (at least in the beginning) - whilst Johnny was more casual with his approach, Morrissey saw him as the love of his life and was possibly led on. We both believe that something definitely happened between them, whether that be a chaste kiss or something more, and this effectively 'confirmed' Johnny's feelings for Moz. However, Johnny, who we both think is bisexual but didn't want to be public about it, had a realisation of 'Oh no if I take this/act on it further then the press will no doubt find out' which led Morrissey to believe that, if taking the lyrics into account as possible evidence, Johnny's 'mentality' needed to catch up to his 'biology' i.e. he needed to stop acting a certain way with Moz whilst maintaining the notion that he wasn't that way inclined in any way. We have tons and tons of theories but there are things we're both very certain about: Marrissey happened in some way, shape or form, Moz was and still might be in love with Marr, Johnny is definitely not straight (I mean we're both especially skeptical about his relationships with other men, the strangely family/friend-less rushed wedding & of course him growing up around queer folk) & lots of Smiths songs were written with Johnny in mind.

Thank you ♡

No, thank you! You're too sweet. This ask made me so happy 🤧

I'm mixed about the truth needing to be "revealed." My best friend Jeevey has talked about this concept a lot better than me - but at a certain point there's no need to reveal anything. Moz is very reserved about his lovers and his sex life. He doesn't even like to admit to being bisexual, despite writing a whole song about it (I Can Have Both). Johnny is even more tight lipped, but just by his actions and words alone we know he's very likely bisexual and in an open marriage with Angie (or in a relationship where she looks the other way when he's sexually and emotionally intimate with others). We know that Johnny and Moz were intimate, and even if, by some crazy chance, they didn't become physical with one another - they absolutely were in some type of relationship that went way beyond a normal, appropriate, platonic friendship. We know this through countless songs, pictures, videos, interviews, and books. Moz one day saying "yes, Johnny and I had sex" really doesn't change that, in my opinion.

Johnny's change in appearance in the 90s is interesting, isn't it? I think about it a lot. I mentioned in my previous ask that it was a surface level change at best, because him and Barney were fucking on the down low and aggressively flirting with one another in every interview, but there is definitely something to it. Because after Boomslang, Johnny got more femme again. He grew his hair back out, wore much tighter clothes. He had that mesh, floral shirt a few years ago. His blonde streak. His silver nail polish. Him wearing eyeliner again. So it's clear he naturally trends towards gender non-conforming. But it may very well have been to distance himself, yeah. Because he was constantly being accused of breaking up the Smiths, of abandoning Moz, of ruining his career...Johnny is so finicky about his hair that him shaving it all off in 1989 was a big deal. And that only lasted to late 1996, early 1997. Then he grew it all back. So there's this 5 year period of him seemingly trying to find who he is again after the breakup. And yet in the middle of all that he's driving Moz out to the moors and writing him lovesick letters, telling him he's so sorry and he didn't explain why he left. It definitely seems to reflect that Johnny sort of lost himself. But I know that Electronic did get a lot of influence from Italo disco/Eurobeat music, and I think that more mobster/gangster style was part of that.

Oh my gosh, I have never heard that line from I Want the One I Can't Have phrased so well - with Johnny's mentality needing to catch up with his biology. And it's so easy to think that title is Moz pining for Johnny, but it's just as applicable from Johnny's side of things, isn't it? Because of how incapable he was of accepting his sexual attraction to Moz. God. I am definitely stealing that for a fic. And yes. You're so right about all of these points. His physical need and desires for Moz was so blatant ("because you let yours flail into public view"), but his insistence that he was definitely not into men because of Angie - yes. I can see that, 100%. He lost a lot of those reservations with Bernard, they made more sexual advances with one another all the time, but in those earlier years with Moz I can imagine that Johnny was struggling to accept how deep his need for Moz was. Fantastic points all around. And god, Moz is still so in love (Darling, I hug a pillow in absence of you. Why can't you just give me some physical love?). Johnny is still gone on him, too, no matter how bitchy he gets about Moz' supposed political viewpoints. They'll never be over one another.

[suffarustuffaru]

so @alderamiin said subaru for the ask…. yes your ask was the one i deleted on accident whoops 😭😭 BUT HERE WE GO I MADE SURE TO REMEMBER TO DO YOURS WKDNDN (and i LOVE subaru fr i simply could not skip over him also) (pls expect my usual chaotic rambling im so sorry i really am overusing the caps button 😳😭😭)

Sexuality Headcanon: bisexual 👍 subaru being somewhere on the ace spectrum isnt a super strong headcanon of mine compared to the bisexual hc but i am still fond of it <33 bc i do tend to just hc him as bisexual but i suppose i could kind of see it <33 :DD !!

Gender Headcanon: subaru is literally, as we’ve all discussed, like EVERY letter of lgbtq+ i swear. like natsumi EXPLICITLY being stated to be his ideal self….. what cisgender boy has his ideal version of himself be a woman…. come on….. and hes been like. dressing and trying to pass as a girl for his crossdressing pre-isekai too. like subarus Practiced A Lot at this. subaru clearly enjoys doing this and he was crushed when he couldnt pass bc of his voice pre-isekai :(( AND LIKE subaru and his complex relationship to masculinity and feeling insecure in his own skin like……………… and then natsumi being his ideal self…… natsumi being the Heroine……….. and its like. subaru clearly has a case of “do i want to be them or be With Them” when it comes to men hes attracted to (most notably julius.) so like. it could apply to women too. like. and then the way subaru reacts to felix’s presentation too………. i just think it says a lot. i dont care what tappei says but he wrote all this shit in the text fr!!! and also in general. natsuki subaru being a gender neutral name…. same with natsumi schwartz… so yes genderqueer subaru for the win. i personally hc subaru as genderfluid or bigender!! and also like. subaru being Very LGBTQ+ is so in line with rezero’s themes of self love and self improvement and self discovery and Identity. i think it hits so much harder if subaru Is lgbtq+ versus if he was just insecure straight cis man. like no wonder subaru was struggling Even More. hes so so far in the closet and struggling with like the internal homophobia and shit fr :(((

that and 1. subaru being lgbt is such a great subversion of what you would think when you first meet his character. and also a subversion of ur typical isekai protag which ADDS to rezeros subversion of isekai in general and 2. i love making Certain People mad with these hcs. like its so supported by the text the only thing missing is explicit confirmation. which. i have my doubts with tappei on that but iirc he DID say he nearly wrote a lust if with the guys…. tappei. come on. you already explicitly said that natsumi is subarus ideal self.

A ship I have with said character: im very open to most subaru ships!!! i just love a lot of them—reinsuba, ottosuba, emisuba, remsuba, julisuba… i just like how each kind of dynamic with subaru has so much range like even in just main route alone?? and then you factor in the ifs and it gets So Interesting. theres so much history with each pairing and so much to explore, whether its platonic or romantic. and subaru has a LOT of love in his heart.

i just like each pairing for different reasons hah—like ok ive talked a lot about reinsuba and emisuba already in other asks so. i DO like remsuba okay. not in the sense that i want it to be the endgame ship in main route bc thats very much not happening and i would prefer The Most Detailed emisuba development of all time. which would be more thematically relevant <3 but i DO ADORE remsubas relationship in general. like its so so complicated??? like. yeah theres the conflict in arc 2. theres the conflict in arc 7 with her waking up and being different and being so mean to him about natsumi :((( theres her “youre my hero” versus “youre not a hero” WHICH. URHGHF ITS SO GOOD….. and like yeah remsuba really do be. iffy. in terms of how healthy it is. but its so complicated bc you also have rem being like—she was like the first person, narratively, to be willing to DIE to save subaru the exact way he does for other people (including rem). and then the famous from zero scene in season one which is a MASTERPIECE but i hate how people fixate on “i love emilia” LIKE REM IS HAPPY FOR SUBARU. SHE IS HAPPY AS LONG AS HE IS. EVEN IF HE DOESNT LIKE HER BACK. but also he did like her back romantically for a time. and also of course rem had her fixation on subaru :(( subaru had his own obsession for emilia while rem had hers for subaru pre-being gluttonyed?? :(( yeah like. remsuba being so complicated is so interesting to me. like she and subaru are very passionate people yes. but also they do need to learn to tone it down sometimes you know? REM ESPECIALLY TOO BECAUSE EVEN AFTER SHE STOPS BEING MURDERY TOWARDS HIM… FOR EXAMPLE IN SEASON ONE SHE WOULD CANONICALLY GO TO HIS ROOM IN THE MORNING AND WAIT FOR HIM TO WAKE UP…. like she'd just sit there at his bedside and Stare at him... like girl chill a bit its okay T^T i havent read sloth if. but it seems like they learned to mellow out and have a happy life T^T apart from. a shit ton of people dying in the background and also subaru dying of old age and resetting back to arc 3. i am interested to see if we’ll get further remsuba closure in arc 8 yes. but also im bonking subaru on the head in arc 7 for saying even REM TORTURING HIM was a fond memory. pls let this be addressed again later i swear sodndn.

ok also julisuba and ottosuba. i am no expert on julisuba but on the other hand i have analyzed Too Much Ottosuba so perhaps i am an expert there wodndn. but YEAH i love those ships. they have so much history and moments between them and they are. definitely the more Explicit evidence of subaru being bi (between subarus Interest in julius and reid calling julisuba boyfriends and SUBARUS INTEREST IN JULIUS... vs ottosuba repeatedly being like “omg do you Like Like me?” “NO I DONT SHUT UP” and also their continued divorce arc dynamics yep). but also i will say i really like ottosuba because specifically they are the subaru pairing where theyre like. Very Much Closer To Being Equals. if theyre not already equals in something. like in terms of power levels and intellect and their very loving families and previous inability to fit in or be believed by people and also their status in the narrative as Being Just A Guy in comparison to everyone else. and yet ottosuba are the MOST important members to their camp for their jobs—subaru keeps everyone alive, and otto handles All the politics, which we see over and over again. they are literally THE power duo. otto is so so important too as the second person to die FOR subaru the same way subarus died for others. like the paralleling of otto pushing subaru out of the way when the white whale drove otto insane (and later otto tried to go back for subaru once he regained his senses ;-;;;) versus otto pushing subaru out of the way so he didnt get killed by garf ;-;;;;;. and otto being the second person after rem to also give subaru an EXTREMELY IMPORTANT speech to him (otto-rem parallels...???) <33 except ottosuba also foil a lot bc of their Different Morals. but theyre both stubborn as hell and have a tendency to go off and do shit they think is best without telling anyone bc theyre too deadset (hah) on what THEY think. (OTTO. SPENDING A WHOLE YEAR SECRETLY GETTING THE BOOK OF WISDOM AND HAVING IT RESTORED?? HELLO???) anyway yeah ill stop right here bc i have So Much ottosuba posts on this damn blog wkdndn but i really do think the appeal of ottosuba is that they Are on a more even playing ground. and their morality flipflops sometimes. ottos issues are just more lowkey than subarus widndnd. i am. however. nervous about all the ottosuba and vincent-chisha parallels in arc 8 bc………. possible otto perma death on the horizon??? 😭😭😭😭 itd CRUSH subaru.

also of course the similar flavors of julisuba and ottosuba….. u can have ur tsundere x tsundere ships in TWO DIFFERENT FONTS. anyway ill become a julius lore expert someday i promise.

A BROTP I have with said character: BROTP ottosuba and ramsuba are so so funny and great wofndn but special shoutout to garf and subaru in particular!!! i think its interesting how far their relationship has come bc they had a VERY rough start and its like. 1. im sure garf would immediately regret going into a rage and killing a shit ton of people in that One Failed Loop and 2. we learn garf is a traumatized fourteen year old whos been trying so hard to take care of the demihumans inside sanctuary while his sister and mom left him, one way or another, and hes very afraid of the outside world. and its like YEAH now your behavior makes sense. and its so good to see garfs growth and also his growth in his relationship with subaru (and otto) bc he looks up to subaru sm!!! subaru helped garf so much T^T theyre brothers guys 😭😭 i think its so adorable and so sweet. ill defend garf all day everyday. garf 🤝 subaru with their DAMN hero complexes while otto tries to keep them both on a leash so they dont do stupid shit. subaru IS a good role model for garf though ill say that. subaru tries so hard to be a good role model wkdndn. and yes i always laugh when garf teases subaru for drawing doodles and writing encouraging things for emilia in the temple.

A NOTP I have with said character: okay so. maybe i will spill some tea here. hah so i went over in ram’s ask how i think ramsuba in wrath if is actually super interesting widndns but otherwise ramsuba to me is bland. which. i also just feel like subaru/crusch and subaru/ana and subaru/priscilla are also bland. like. i dont think theyll ever feel interesting to me akdndn. like theres not. as much to work off of imo. like i just dont think theyre a good match romantically at all. like At All. priscilla especially LMAO…. and im tired of people reducing women in the story to just boobs and being fucked by subaru 😭😭😭 like i dont have anything against those subaru ships, my biggest notp is just seeing a bunch of characters be butchered just to have subaru have sex with various women. 😭😭 obviously not everyone in the fandom does that but i see this happens the most with priscilla fr. pls. shes more than just boobs :(((

anyway. my other notp is like. echidna/subaru but like. i feel similarly to ram/roswaal on this where its like. theres a potential there to show a nuanced complex toxic relationship bc THAT IS what echidna/subaru are. even more so in greed if. like theyve spent an UNGODLY amount of time together like their relationship is so fucked. like god the amount of details that were added to their dynamic in the greed if ln makes me go INSANE….. like you know how echidna said that subaru could use her body with this contract?? what she ALSO really meant was HEY SUBARU YOU CAN KILL ME IF YOU WANT. ILL JUST COME BACK BC WE ALWAYS MEET IN A DREAM WORLD AND THERES NO CONSEQUENCES BUT ITLL FEEL REAL TO YOU. LIKE HOLY FUCK FR 😭😭 and like in generally reading through greed if ln is a Trip alright. like “no yeah duh of course it is, suffaru, its GREED IF” but LISTEN……. echidna being subarus weird mother figure and then like. idk there are obvious implications i feel from like the body fluid tea and then echidna being like “you can use my body” and then theres a moment where she puts his hand on her chest and yeah its to feel her heart but LIKE…. SOMETHING ABOUT THAT SCENE FELT LIKE. SOMETHING. TO ME. AND THEN SHES SO OBSESSED WITH HIM AND HES DEPENDENT ON HER LIKE JESUS ITS A MESS. ITS LIKE HOW SHE WAS WITH OG ROSWAAL. GOD. *puts my head in my hands*

anyway my real notp is like. depicting echidna/subaru like it is a Healthy Thing like no it is not 😭😭😭😭 it never was healthy and it literally never will be unless ur changing echidnas character drastically. if ur gonna show off echidna/subaru then they are gonna be SO RANCID in like every way possible there is no other correct way to write them. she is terrible for him. she literally saw him and went “i can make him worse” and then it happened. bc greed if subaru is a Terrible Person. like. its not even a question. the biggest example i can think of rn other than obvious Rbd use is KEEPING MEILI. A CHILD. HOSTAGE AND LOCKED UP IN ORDER TO USE ELSA. HER OLDER SISTER FIGURE. JEEZ. my biggest notp of all time is treating unhealthy relationships as if they Arent unhealthy.

MY OTHER BIGGEST NOTP OF ALL TIME FOR ANYTHING IS SHIPPING A CHILD AND AN OLDER PERSON TOGETHER. subaru/petra SHOULD BE AN OBVIOUS NOTP BUT SURE DOESNT FEEL LIKE IT SOMETIMES….. guys she is a child. come on. hes seventeen and shes TWELVE. GUYS…. and then theres tappei making iirc an ACTUAL petra if????? and idk what the content in petra if is exactly but i worry given tappeis track record with the child characters sometimes 😭😭 AND THEN PETRA BEING IN LUST IF. TAPPEI…… N-NOTHING HAPPENS, RIGHT? *EXPLODES WITH RAGE*. even if petra and subaru get together later when theyre Older Adults in some AU or something its like. subaru knew her when she was a young child. and she had a crush on him then. um. personally idk if im fully comfortable with that hah T^T

A random headcanon: GONNA TALK ABOUT WRATH IF. anyway so the wrath if divergence point is that subaru gets beatrice to teleport him away and ram chases him down, ram tries to strangle him to death but fails, he smashes her head with a rock. yes. BUT OKAY when u watch the anime. beatrice comes for his aid AFTER subaru gets to the cliff and tries to psych himself up to like. jump off to save rem and stuff. THEREFORE wrath if subaru still considered trying to rbd via jumping off that cliff. he just decided not to and agreed to have beatrice teleport him away. this is something not many people seem to mention or maybe even notice (??) but I THINK ABOUT IT A LOT…. :((

General Opinion over said character: i LOVE SUBARU WITH MY WHOLE BEING. he is my absolute favorite anime character of all time. his character arc is so chaotic and complicated and i think the way he Does like still struggle with the same Inner Conflicts is so so much more realistic. recovery and self improvement are NOT linear and he shows that perfectly. and i hate how much people misread subaru T^T the whole chadbaru trend in fandom of how he should get harems or how he should leave everyone or be terrible to emilia for *insert a long list of Terrible reasons here* is so. like did we all read and watch the same damn story or what hah. the whole point of rezero is LOVE ITSELF….. and subaru ultimately has a lot of love for so many people around him. though of course i do worry for how rbd reveal is going to be handled, and im not entirely sure how to feel about subarus arc 7 development atm. rbd reveal is gonna have catastrophic consequences for Everyone. like everyone hes ever been close to finding out hes died a shit ton of times to save him?? that so many of them have like. maimed and killed him or at least Tried To Do That? like HOW are we gonna get a happy ending out of all of this—hows tappei gonna handle this?? 😭😭 i worry sometimes that when rbd reveal happens it wont be nuanced or itll gloss over certain things or it just. wont be so satisfying. bc u have arc 7 subaru out here with SUICIDE PILLS……. ARC 7 SUBARU IN REPEATED INSANE DEATH LOOPS AS A CHILD….. how are we gonna come back from this?? 😭😭 i have my doubts sometimes but tappei loves insane character development for subaru so i suppose i will hope. i just wish for all the trauma to be seen and addressed akdndn and the fact that rbd is so. complicated. it makes subaru and his relationships with everyone else so complicated. and rbd is inherently unfair in a lot of ways to both subaru and everyone hes close to. i cant wait for more subaru development but i also think after arc 8 he NEEDS a break or like otherwise, personally i think subarus gonna snap for good and not be able to return from it 😭😭 or ill just have to suspend my uhh disbelief. i suppose. but yes i do love subaru a lot!!! his hair is a Pain in the ass to draw but ill endure the pain just for him. <33

but regarding all of subarus loved ones maiming and killing him a lot—i think its fascinating how the if routes prove he is JUST as capable of ruining all their lives. like i feel like people forget that sometimes in favor of woaaah cool what if routes where subaru becomes “badass”…. but LIKE…. hes SO SO CAPABLE of so much destruction. he is choice itself. he is capable of changing the entire world and everyone around him. he is capable of causing the deaths and trauma for SO MANY PEOPLE… and like i think rezero itself and subarus relationships are like an extreme version of hedgehog’s dilemma, u know? like u get close to people to love and be loved, but ur also very vulnerable to getting hurt. and rezero is About love. and part of close relationships are that ur so close u Can be hurt. maybe you Will be hurt. but u will also Love….. unless ur one of the ifbarus then fuck u for making the wrong decisions ig wodndndn. im telling u guys that subaru is LITERALLY an eldritch being at this rate. todd is so right.

and. okay one last thing im gonna be real for a second. im a little eh on subaru being a child, honestly. like i DO like the trope of turning characters back into their child selves in order to explore their psychology that way!! but like. idk i feel like the childbaru arc is kinda too similar to the whole amnesiabaru arc in arc 6. it feels Extraneous. it doesnt feel different enough for me personally. (emphasis on personally. this is all my opinion hah.) and then he is STILL A CHILD IN ARC 8 EVEN THOUGH THE OTHER PEOPLE THAT GOT TURNED INTO KIDS ARE NOW BACK TO NORMAL…… LIKE…. im sorry but the childbaru has overstayed its welcome by the time we get to arc 8 imo 😭😭

[freckle-face-ace]

Portgas D Ace X CisFem Reader

5

Both of you were sent reeling. 

You were trying to figure out how someone here knew Ace. It shouldn't be possible, but you supposed you couldn't count anything out anymore.

Ace's mouth gaped, watching in disbelief as the brunette slowly approached. His hair was smoothed back into an impressive pompadour that shadowed his attractive face. Your eyes wandered to the crescent scar that hooked from his left temple to his cheekbone. Realization washed over you, he was exactly how Ace had described him.

"Thatch." Ace breathed shakily, tears beginning to sting his garnet eyes.

The cook stopped upon hearing his name. All the thoughts pooling in his mind confirmed with the sound of Ace's voice. This wasn't a hallucination, a dream or a really impressive doppelganger. It was really Ace.

You watched, heart clenching as the men gawked at each other, tears now streaming down both of their faces. Thatch finally willed himself to move forward almost frantically hugging the raven.

A beautiful strawberry blond walked up adjusting her black framed glasses. She had an authoritative posture that led you to believe she was in management.

"Thatch? Is everything alright?" Her alto voice was thick with concern.

You realized there weren't many people in the restaurant, but all of their eyes were on your table.

Thatch stepped back looking up at the woman with the most brilliant smile you'd ever seen, "This is my brother, Ace."

Her face fell briefly before she smiled warmly, "Why don't we move you to a more private space?"

Yes please!

You were so uncomfortable with all of the new attention. The yet to be named woman motioned for you to rise and follow her. Thatch stayed close to Ace as you were ushered to a small private dining room connected to the main room by a narrow hallway. Three tables swathed in white linens formed a triangle in the center of the room. The four of you took a seat at the nearest.

"I'm Grace." The woman smiled stretching her hand toward you, "I haven't seen you around."

"F/N," You responded mirroring her expression, "I live out near the bluffs...I don't come into town often."

"Ah you're Anabelle's granddaughter." She chimed, "She was a great lady."

"T-thank you." You nodded.

"I can't believe you're here." Thatch marveled at his brother making the rest of you frown.

Grace seemed to be somewhat clued in to how they'd arrived.

"Thatch..." She said softly, placing her hand on his shoulder.

He watched her expression change to something more somber. His eyes widened, tears once again breaching his lashes.

"W-wait...not you."

Your heart broke watching pain flicker across Thatch's sweet face. Grace wrapped her arms around his shoulders. He'd been so excited to see Ace that how he got here hadn't occurred to him.

"Was it Teach?" Thatch asked quietly regaining his composure.

Ace's jaw clenched at the mention of Teach's name.

"Marines." The raven finally replied.

Thatch deflated, "What about Pops? The crew?"

"I- I don't know. There was a pretty big battle. I wasn't around for the outcome."

You flinched at his flat response.

"F/N...why don't we give them a moment." Grace rose running her hand over Thatch's back.

You glanced at Ace.

"I'll come find you." He nodded.

Grace took you down a hallway opposite the way you'd come. You entered a small but cozy office. Grace moved around the wooden desk taking a seat in the office chair folding her arms over the marked-up desktop calendar. You claimed a small armchair directly in front of her still feeling uncomfortable with the whole situation.

"How did you find him?" She asked resting her chin in her palm.

You were hesitant to respond. It was too ridiculous to say out loud and people around here already had their ideas about 'the recluse that lives on the hill'. Grace seemed to notice your discomfort.

"I found Thatch lying on the side of the road on my way to the restaurant one morning. Who knows how long he was there or just how many people had passed him by thinking he was some drunk knocked out." A warm smile played upon her full lips.

This was a pleasant memory for her it seemed.

"I'll admit his story took some convincing. I mean a pirate? Magic fruits and all that? Sounds like something you'd read in a comic book." She chuckled, "I feel bad, there was still a part of me that didn't believe him until I saw Ace."

"He uh-" You cleared your throat, "He fell from the sky."

She blinked at you, "How?"

"I'm not sure. But I saw it with my own eyes. Surrounded by flames, he just dropped right into the silt bank of my pond." You watched her waiting for a sign of disbelief.

She nodded, "Maybe that's how both of them got here."

"What do you think happens now?" You asked feeling a knot form in your stomach.

"Well, I'm not sure what they'll want to do." She started, "We could take him in at our place."

"Our?" You echoed, blushing embarrassed that your curiosity betrayed you.

"Mhm. We live together." She hummed, the look on her face telling you it was more than just that.

"Oh." Was all you could muster.

"It seems you're not keen on giving Ace up though." She used an upward inflection, but you knew it was meant to be a statement.

"I'll be fine with whatever he chooses." You shrugged the knots crawling through your gut away.

She only smiled.

The office door opened slightly as Ace entered the room alone.

"Thatch went to pack up our food." He chirped jabbing his thumb in the direction he'd just come, "Are you OK if I hang out with him tonight?"

You braved a fake smile, for whatever reason dreading being home alone, "Of course. Go spend time with your brother."

A grin broke out across the raven's face.

"We should exchange numbers then." Grace piped pulling out her phone.

After gathering your dinner, you parted ways. The drive home felt longer than usual. Once inside you tossed you untouched food in the fridge and slinked to your room flopping down on your bed. You weren't sure how many times you sighed or how long you stared at the ceiling fan before your eyes grew too heavy.

Something rattled against your night stand stirring you from the comfortable position you'd found in your sleep. You blindly slid your hand across the wooden surface, so you could snatch the device.

"Hullo?" You husked.

"F/N," Grace's flustered tone jarred you awake, "It's Ace. He's having some sort of panic attack."

You were already jamming your feet into your boots, "What's your address? I'll be right there."

[splendidreads]

Open Your Arms, Part 2

Mob!Bucky Barnes x Female OC

Word Count: 3182

Warnings: Mentions of not being treated well, nothing other than that for this chapter.

Summary: ‘Arranged marriages are never easy. This one is no exception. Both sides will have to relearn their ways, and learn to trust each other. Bucky has all the love to give, but Katherine doesn’t know how to accept real love. She’s never been loved by anyone other than her best friend. Will she learn to open her heart, to New Yorks most notorious Mob Boss? Or is she too scared, that he’s just like everyone else?’

A/N; This is my FIRST Bucky story. As well as my first AU story. If this first part does well, I’ll keep on going. I’m incredibly beyond nervous about this. Constructive criticism welcome, but please be nice. Please re-post and comment :)

I do NOT give permission for my work to be copied and posted on here or any other site, even if you give me credit. PLEASE just reblog if you want to share my story!!

Will happily start a tag list if anyone is interested!

PART 3 NOW POSTED

“You’ve never been outside of New York?”

Steve’s bewildered question made Katherine shrug her shoulders, as she picked a piece of pepperoni off her pizza, eating it silently.

“Well, if that information is such a shock, I can’t imagine what your reactions will be like..” She ate a piece of sausage this time, “..When I tell you that I can count the number of times I’ve left the city, on one hand.”

Both men’s mouths fell agape, which made her let out a bit of a laugh.

“Are you serious?” Bucky shook his head, not quite believing her.

“Unfortunately.” She nodded her head, confirming it to be true.

Dinner with them had gone really well, and most of her nerves were gone. They had been talking about pretty simple things, just learning about each other. They had essentially been playing 20 questions, and it turned out to be a bit of fun. They now knew each other's favorite colors; Steve’s was blue, Bucky’s was dark green or dark red, and Katherine’s was purple. Both Steve and Bucky enjoyed the outdoors, whereas Katherine had spent most of her life inside.

“Looks like I need to get some miles under your belt.” Bucky said to her, a grin spread across his face.

Katherine’s cheeks tinted a shade of pink, feeling his eyes on her. She definitely felt like there was something between them.. But was it because of the deal, or was it real? She was hesitant to even attempt to explore the idea, barely knowing him. He was very attractive, and seemed really kind. But, she hardly knew him.

“We should go to Alaska again sometime,” Steve said, before finishing his eighth slice of pizza. “Take her out to the cabin for a few days.”

Katherines smile returned, “Alaska? I hear that you can see all of the stars out there, you don’t even need a telescope!”

Both Bucky and Steve let out soft chuckles, “Are you into astronomy?” Bucky asked her, an eyebrow raised.

She nodded her head as she took a sip of her drink, “Oh yes. Quite unfortunate for me though, you can’t see much here in the city.” She shrugged her shoulders, trying to seem not too bothered by that.

Little did she know, Bucky’s mind was already trying to formulate a plan. Even though they weren’t married yet, or even really in a relationship… Yet. Bucky still wanted to take care of her. She was his, and he was hers.

“Did your parents never take you to do things like that?” Steve asked her, and her face fell.

She knew the topic would eventually come up, she had just hoped to avoid it a while longer. Bucky’s eyebrows furrowed on his face, noticing the change in her attitude.

“Uhm,” She cleared her throat, “No.. My mom passed away when I was 13. And dad.. He doesn’t really do much.” She had hoped that would be enough, but judging by the looks on their faces.. More questions would follow.

“Is he still gambling?” Bucky asked her, lowering his voice a bit. Steve let out a soft sigh, looking at the pizza. He was already aware of her mother, he paid for the funeral.

“Yep..” Katherine popped her lips with the word, a crisp ‘P’ sound coming from them.

Bucky shifted in his seat, his once happy tone seeming to have changed. It seemed as if gears were turning in his head.

“Katherine,” he looked to her, reaching his metallic hand a bit closer towards her, “I have a feeling that I’ve been lied to.. And that your situation isn’t what it should be.. Is he not treating you well?”

She shifted her eyes away from him, not daring to meet his icy blue orbs. She never knew the exact details of the deal between her father and Bucky, but she was aware enough to know that Bucky had indeed been lied to. The familiar feeling of anxiety began to itch its way towards the surface, her arms instinctively wrapping around her middle. This was it.. This was the moment Bucky would decide he didn’t want her anymore, because she wasn’t what was promised. She had a memory of hearing her dad on the phone with someone.. ‘No. She didn’t make the grades, she’s not going to college.’ Which had been a complete lie. Katherine’s High School transcript showed straight A’s. She wanted to go to college, she had been accepted to 3 different schools. She remembered her father telling her that she had to get a second job, so they wouldn’t lose the house, and that paying for college would’ve been a waste of time. If only she had realized back then, what was truly going on.

Bucky let out a huff of air, leaning back in his seat, contemplating his next words. She didn’t even have to answer him, for him to know that her life wasn’t great. Steve had told him about the small amount of luggage she had, and Annette told him that it was mostly work clothes. For two different jobs. Needless to say, Bucky was upset.

“Hey, Buck?” Steve’s voice sounded, grabbing the attention of both silent parties, “They’re closing up shop. It’s almost nine o’clock..”

Katherine looked around the restaurant, realizing that Steve was correct. The workers had begun cleaning, and setting chairs on top of tables. Which meant the three of them had been there for nearly 4 hours. She couldn’t remember a time where she was actually able to spend that long just talking, and enjoying some company. The anxiety had started to cloud her eyes, her leg bouncing underneath the table. Just then, her phone started buzzing in her pocket. It was Sage, of course. There wasn’t anyone else who would call her.

“You need to take that?” Bucky’s voice snapped her out of her daze.

“Oh,” she chuckled softly, pulling her phone out, “It’s Sage, my best friend.” She raised her phone, showing him Sages face, “She’s not the most patient person..”

“Go ahead. I’ll take care of the check.” He offered a small, tight lipped smile.

She nodded to him, before getting up to leave the table. She gave both men a small, polite smile, before walking out the door of the restaurant. She was still in perfect view of the men, which is probably the only reason why they didn’t follow her. She chuckled, realizing that Sage was video calling her.

“Before you start yelling at me..”

Sage let out a long, dramatic groan, “Okay fine.”

Katherine chuckled softly, pacing up and down the sidewalk next to the car they were using, “You interrupted dinner actually.”

“It’s almost nine!!”

“We went to a pizza place, and got lost in conversation.” Katherine shrugged, her eyes glancing into the building to see that the two men were still seated, “Since when did I ever just… Talk?”

“Like, to a guy? Never. You suck at flirting.” Sage retorted, chuckling.

Katherine shook her head, “No, not like.. Flirting. Just.. Talking. It was really nice actually..” She gently kicked the concrete with the top of her shoe, “We laughed, smiled, had a great evening..”

“But?”

She let out a sigh, “But then we got onto the topic of my father, and now my anxiety is all over the place. I guess you might’ve saved me.”

Sage was silent for a moment. She knew that the conversation was probably very uncomfortable for Katherine.

“Well.. what did he say?”

Katherine hummed softly, “He asked if I was treated well.. Then you called. So, thanks for saving me from that explanation.” She let out a breathless chuckle, not realizing that the men were heading outside.

“He needs to know.” Sage said, shrugging her shoulders.

“He will.. I just.. Don’t think it’s best for the first day.”

Sage let out a breath, “When do you think I might get to meet your future beloved?”

Katherine let out a laugh, before realizing Steve and Bucky were walking towards her. She unconsciously began to chew her lower lip, a tint of pink spreading on her cheeks. “Uhm…”

Bucky raised an eyebrow, a small on his lips as he walked towards her. He glanced at her phone, sliding his hands into his pants pockets. “Is this her?” He asked softly, Katherine nodding in response.

Sage heard the voice, both of her eyebrows quirking upwards. “Is that him??”

Katherine rolled her eyes at the two, deciding to just move the phone to where Sage could see Bucky as well. He raised a hand to wave at her, a cute grin on his face.

“Hiya.”

Sage nodded her head, “Hi yourself, Mr. Barnes.”

Bucky looked to Katherine, wondering what they had been talking about, but he knew it wasn’t his place to push it.

“I was asking Katie when she thinks I might get to meet you. I’d like to know the man who will be taking care of my best friend.. You will be taking care of her, right?”

Katherine’s eyes were daggers, staring at Sage through the phone.

Bucky let out a soft chuckle, the sound sending a chill through her body, “Yes of course I will be. And,” he sent Katherine a sweet grin, “Whenever Katherine would like, you are welcome whenever. I can send a car to get you tomorrow if you’d like.”

Katherine’s eyes widened, a grin spreading on her lips, “Really..?”

Bucky nodded, “Well, yeah. I’m not going to keep you from anyone. Like I said, what’s mine is now yours. That applies to you wanting to have guests over.”

Steve opened the door for them, signaling that it was time to go. Bucky placed his hand on the small of Katherine’s back, leading her into the car.

“Then I guess I’ll see you tomorrow Sagey! I’ll talk to you later, okay?” Katherine hummed, giving her friend a smile as she got into the car, Bucky sliding in after her.

“Sounds good to me! Love you bunches!”

“I love you too.” She returned the words, before ending the call.

“She seems fun.”

Katherine’s eyes looked at Bucky, who seemed to be holding in a laugh. She glanced towards the front, Steve seeming to be doing the same. Soon though, Katherine began to laugh, Steve and Bucky letting out their laughter as well.

“Yeah, yeah.. She’s uhm.. She can be a lot, sometimes.” Katherine grinned, “She just worries about me..” She let out a soft sigh, “Besides dad, she’s really all I have.”

Bucky’s expression softened, hearing her words. He glanced towards Steve, who was focused on driving now. He hesitantly reached for her hand with his flesh one, gently capturing her soft skin. He offered a kind smile.

“You have me now.”

Katherine looked to his eyes, only to find they were already peering into her own. She didn’t flinch away from the contact, finding that even though his hand was a bit rough.. It was also quite warm.

“And me!” Steve shouted to them, making both Bucky and Katherine chuckle.

Her lips curved up into a small smile, nodding her head to Bucky. “You’re right.”

The remainder of the car ride was spent in silence. Bucky’s hand still gently holding onto Katherine’s, both of them lost deep in their thoughts. It wasn’t an awkward silence though, Katherine was actually quite comfortable. Her eyes gazed out the car window as the car came to a stop, the big house towering over them. She noticed, though, a man standing at the base of the steps. It was someone she thought she had recognized.. She was snapped out of her daze, when she realized Bucky’s hand was in front of her, him having opened the door for her.

“Come on.” He smiled, as Katherine took his hand.

“Thank you.” She said, getting up and out of the car.

Bucky gently held her hand, moving her hand to rest on the inside of his arm, as they walked up towards the house. Steve walked up next to them, eyeing the man as they approached.

“Mr. Stark..” Bucky’s voice greeted him, no particular emotion in his voice.

Katherine looked towards the man, curiously, but she could feel Bucky bring her closer to him. She realized who the man was; He was rather famous. At least, in New York. He was a VIP wherever he went.. Geneous, Billionaire, Playboy, Philanthropist.

“Mr. Barnes, Mr. Rogers.” The man had his arms crossed on his chest, an eyebrow quirking up when his eyes laid on Katherine, “And who is this?”

She was about to give him her name, but Bucky’s words were first, “My girl.”

Katherine felt her cheeks heat up, she was sure that everyone else could see it as well. Did he really just introduce her… As his girl? Something about the words made butterflies dance in the pit of her stomach. In reality, it was true.. They hadn’t actually spoken about it, but that was the deal.

“Ah, so it’s true.” Mr. Stark let out a soft huff of air, “When's the wedding? I’ll have to send a gift.”

Katherine tensed under the man’s gaze, instinctively trying to hide in Bucky’s side. Her eyes met Steve’s, and it seemed that he sensed her discomfort. Bucky must have as well, because he removed her hand from his arm, and draped his arm around her shoulders.

“There’s no date yet, I’ll let you know.” Bucky let out a sigh, “What can I do for ya, Tony? We’re just getting back.. You can wait in my office for me.”

His eyes stayed on Katherine for a long moment, before nodding his head towards Bucky, “Business as per usual. I’ll be waiting.”

Steve opened the door, Tony walking in and headed towards Bucky’s office. Steve followed him, as if he always did. Bucky walked with Katherine, his arm still around her as he led her up to her bedroom. They stopped at her door, Bucky letting out a soft sigh.

“I’m sorry, Katherine. I had hoped to be able to spend more time with you tonight.. But duty calls.”

Katherine offered him a small smile, “It’s alright.. Thank you for dinner. I had a really great time tonight.”

Bucky’s lips curved into a grin, “Me too, doll.”

“Will I see you before the end of the night?” She asked, actually a bit hopeful that he might say yes.

His arm fell from around her, his hand raising to gently tuck a strand of hair behind her ear, their eyes locked on each other. He kept his grin, “Of course. Let’s just hope this meeting doesn’t last forever.. Tony talks a lot.”

Katherine chuckled a bit, “Well, you have fun with that.”

They both laughed softly, not seeming to really want to leave. Katherine let out a soft sigh, turning to open her bedroom door. Bucky started to walk off, but found himself looking back at her, a smile on his lips. Katherine returned the smile, before going into her room.

The rest of her night was pretty.. Calm. She had unpacked her clothes, which took up almost no space in her closet. She video called Sage for a bit, before deciding to take a shower. She stood under the hot beams of water for a while, just relaxing. Her mind wouldn’t stop though.. Her thoughts were completely consumed by Bucky. She tried her best to not think about the rumors and stories she’d heard about him, forming her own opinion. He had been nothing but kind to her, and she genuinely enjoyed his presence. His smile made her weak at the knees, and his laugh was contagious. She never thought that it would be this easy to like the man she was promised to. Though, she was sure that this might just be a fluke, only being the first day. As she got out of the shower, she looked at herself in the mirror. She sighed softly as she brushed her teeth, and went through the usual nightly routine. She decided that pajamas were calling for her, as well as her bed.. She looked at the time on her phone. Bucky had been in the meeting for almost three hours. She let out a breath, as she pulled her oversized t-shirt on. Just as she sat on her bed, she received a text.

‘Something else had come up, during the meeting.. I’m afraid I might not make it up to see you, before you go to bed. Don’t wait up, I’ll see you in the morning.’

Katherine read the words, and actually felt.. A bit sad that she wouldn’t see him. Regardless, he was a busy man. She didn’t even know what all he did, being the head of the mob. She replied to his text pretty directly.

‘It’s alright, I understand. I’m going to read for a while, before I actually go to bed.’

She pulled up a book on her phone, going to where she last left off. Her eyes were soon glued to the words, as she snuggled into the bed. Which was the most comfortable bed she’d ever felt. Soon, her mind was completely divulged into the fantasy world she read about. She almost stopped thinking about him, but of course her mind decided to play tricks.

She wasn’t sure when she fell asleep, having read a few chapters of her book. But the sound of her bedroom door opening, stirred her a bit. She rolled over in the bed, attempting to pull apart her heavy eyelids.

“Shh, doll. It’s just me..”

Bucky.

She could hear him moving around her room, and felt that he touched the bed. He had taken her phone, putting it on the phone charger and setting it on the nightstand. Katherine managed to get her eyes open, a small smile spreading across her lips.

“Hi..” her voice was soft, very obviously sleepy.

A low rumble of a chuckle passed his lips, as he leaned over the bed. He tucked some hair behind her ear, like before. She could feel his breath on her face, and her drowsy mind wanted her to pull him closer.

“Bucky…” She hummed out his name, leaning her head into his hand.

“I’m just checking on you.. Get some sleep, alright? We’ll have breakfast in the morning, and can talk then.” His voice was quiet, soft and velvety smooth.

She hummed in response, slowly nodding her head towards him. She wanted to be wide awake. She wanted to stay up with him, talking, seeing that smile.. But she was already so tired, and laid comfortably in her bed. She managed to keep her eyes open long enough, to see that he was looking at her.

In a sleepy daze, her voice sounded out to him, “My girl?” She asked him, though not really having intended to do so.

He smiled at her, nodding his head, “Gotta make sure the world knows it. Can’t have anyone trying to come in and sweep you away from me..”

Those were the last words she heard, before she settled back into the bed, falling asleep.

[miitarashi]

"Get down!" - Tintin yelled.

Both you and Haddock roll on the floor as the tugs keep shooting,trying to at least take one of you out of the way.

Hiding behind a pilar nearby,you and the jornalist begin to exchanging fire with the men on the other side, always taking care to hide in the second after the shot.

"[Name]! try to get out and call for help,we'll handle it as much we can" - he say almost yelling for you to hear since the noise of gunfire filled the air around you.

It was the most logical plan, so you waved in confirmation and turned to look at the door, but there was only one is the big room and it was located right behind where the thieves were.

"I can't! it's right behind them!" - you explain after giving more two shoots,hitting the pilar that the tugs are.

Tintin only make a small "tsk" with his tongue, stopping for a moment to collect his thoughts, thinking in a way out of this terrible situation by a poorly executed plan to recover a stolen figurine.

"Ok...we'll have to pass through,i know,but this is our only option" - he begin,looking both at you and Haddock.

You and the old man looked at each other, nodding and listening carefully to the plan of the ginger-haired boy in front of you.

After a brief moment to discuss,all of you stayed still and hiden,waiting for the sound of gunfire to stop for a moment, which would indicate they had taken a quick break to reload. Without delay, the shooting ceased. The thieves have stopped, pulling their weapons back to load more ammo and at that moment, you, Tintin and Haddock rush forward.

With the rest of the bullets, you all shoot at the bandits who hide in their hiding places so as not to be hit. Instead of fighting head-on, the best option was to run away due to the difference in numbers, so when you got close to them, the three of you deviated from the path, heading straight for the door.

"Wait! Damn it! Give the figurine back!!" - one of the men shouted, grunting with anger when he saw the object in the captain's hand.

"Come on come on, almost...!" - he said, sounding more like a plea to reach the door as quickly as possible.

As if she heard him, the lucky lady smiles at them and the three of you arrive at the door, opening it immediately and running outside. However, one shot.

Neither of you three looked behind, even after the sound, only making your best to run fast away from the hide out. Getting inside of the nearby forest, hiding between some bushes you all were finally out of sight and reach of the bandits, being able to take a deep breath for a moment.

"That...was certainly close.." - Tintin say out of breath.

"Don't ye tell me..." - he fall sloopy on the floor, letting the statuette aside.

You were about to say something along, ready to take a deep breath first before talking but as the adrenaline sets down, you feel a sting in your chest. Looking down, your vision begin to blur, your shirt is wet. Touching on it and looking better, your blood froze.

That shoot, that one shoot before running away. Your legs feel weak immediately making you fall harsh on the floor attracting the attention of both at the same time.

"[Name]!" - he quickly comes closer, taking you in his arms. Both his and Haddock's face becoming pale at the sight of blood flooding from your chest.

"No...no no no!" - his hand start to shake, fear and guilty filling his mind. If he had do a better plan, not even that, he shouldn't have brought you along!

"By a thousand devils...she got shot in the chest!" - he exclaimed, more like a thought out loud without wanting to believe his own words.

Your body began to weaken from the loss of blood, in Tintin's mind, he knew that it would take time for the police or ambulance to arrive at the place where they are, the shot was accurate enough to not give time or room for hopes.

Tintin was feeling it. The heat of your body decreasing, your skin losing color gradually and your breath growing slower. And he? He couldn't do nothing. Only hold you firmly in his arms, a knot forming on his throat when tears threaten to fall. Your eyes almost closing preventing him from doing so.

"Please- please don't close your eyes [Name]! stay awake...please..." - his voice diminished, little by little becoming a failed whisper, hugging your body with strength and care.

"Please...please stay with me..." - he pleads, whispering. You could feel a tear falling on your face, it was hard to see him crying.

You remember, this happen only one time in Chang's incident but now, he was helplessly holding onto you with all his might.

"...i'm...sorry..." - you replied weakly, taking out a hand that seemed heavy due to the level of effort you were making.

"...sorry...for this to be...our...last adventure...." - you manage to reach his face,a light caress on his cheek.

"Don't say it...please..." - he hold you hand on his face,without containing his tears at this point.

"please...never stop...just because of this...you're...an incredible adventure...and...the...love of my life..." - you speak,each second that pass, more difficult is to breath and talk but you don't give up just yet. Just, a little more.

"be happy...both of you..." - you looked for the old captain by side eye,the men crying as well holding his hat against his chest in a respectful manner kneeling down next to you.

"...i love you..." - your eyes close.

The hand on his face almost falling from there,but he hold it tight with his own,biting his lower lip for a moment to regain a slight amout of composure as he bend down lightly and kiss your forehead before resting his own against yours.

"...i love you too...and forever i'll..."

He whispered back,only hoping that you could hear him. Before you go.

_________________________________________

A/N: boo! I didn't warned on purpose. I know, i know i should,but this wouldn't have the same impact you know? And it's just a creative moment that i was inspires by a tik tok with this prompt. Since Tintin's fandom don't have this type of content,i'm pushing my luck on this one. Hope you guys liked it 😘

[bengiyo]

The Warp Effect Ep 9 Stray Thoughts

Last time, we solved the current issues for Army and Kat. Kat teased a relationship with Jean, and now I need it. Kat also made me think about I May Destroy You all week, so there's that, too. Army and Joe learned how to be intimate in a way both could enjoy with Alex's help (clearly the most comfortable straight man). Kim is pregnant, but it seems like she doesn't want to keep it; Ice is excited to become a dad. Also, Nim and Bew broke up because Bew is going to America and is jealous of Mollie.

We're jumping right in to Jedi and Rose, who seem good about checking in when they go out. Unfortunately for Rose, Jedi clearly has an STD he's been avoiding dealing with.

Kinda interesting that the image for Jedi and Rose was witnessed by Alex, whereas in the others it feels like some other camera captured the image.

Oh, I do like Army leading with their HIV status. If Jedi is out there being unsafe, there's many debilitating things he could pick up and give to Rose. She has every right to be furious with him.

Due to the supernatural, I'll forgive this not-doctor and actual doctor disclosing patient information to others.

See-ew is wearing a Space Force shirt.

I don't think I had considered much which doctors trans women would visit about their sexual health depending on what paths they chose to pursue for gender confirmation.

Nim is pregnant, and Army's desire to be involved is giving me Queer as Folk vibes.

Okay, the excited little gay wiggle Fluke Pusit did for Army's mirth about becoming a father was good. He's talented, and treating this character seriously.

Good of Alex to cap off that conversation by reminding Nim that it's her choice and all of the men present support her. Alex is intriguing as a character, because he's still basically 18.

Very uncomfortable about pregnant Kim having alcohol and hanging out around smokers.

Chaladee and Phuwin are pretty good together. She's got to convey a lot of different feelings here, and Phuwin is responding in character as Ice really well. Managing an unwanted pregnancy when the non-pregnant partner wants it is not simple, and I like the way they're grounding Kim's reluctance. It's especially notable because we go back to the movie set, and Kim is clearly thriving here.

Yes, I am here for Mollie getting to loom.

Joong is very attractive, and I prefer when he has to bring more energy to his acting. GMMTV seems obsessed with making him play quieter and cool characters.

Babies are not a punishment for mistakes. It's also (currently) legal to get an abortion at this stage. I know the show is setting up this conversation to hammer home the point, and I'm going to reiterate it.

Oh, Jean. Also glad that we're acknowledging that any medical procedure can be scary, and few of us want to face that alone.

It was a very good choice to follow that scene with Ice talking to Alex. Despite their fraught relationship, Alex is still his brother, and he's a specialist on women's health issues. Alex steers Ice away from making the issue about him.

The timing of much of this is good. I like Army a lot here. He shares that he's actually excited at the prospect of becoming a parent, is willing to do it with Nim, and assures her he'll still respect her choice.

Interesting development! Jedi insists that he only has sex with Rose.

Joe and Army can't have one big moment without someone rolling up and immediately reaching for their phone. Goddamn. Y'all need to leave people the fuck alone. Joe isn't ready to be out, and he's going to blame Army for this because he came to the school.

The homoeroticism of laying on the floor after exerting yourselves together. We stay winning.

Placing Jan where her eyes would sparkle when she looked at Silvy was a gorgeous choice.

Jojo said, but what if the whole show was second chance romances??

I like that Nim and Mollie solved their own problem after others helped them with unrelated problems. It's a gentle message about how caring helps beyond the initial instance.

Is dressing like a flight attendant related in any way to what Captain did to Kat?

Another interesting development! Kat says Rose also insists she doesn't have sex with other people.

Alex thinking he possibly gave HPV to Kat was funny.

Newwie is actually pretty good in this role.

Oh, the mirror is a nice choice in the reconciliation between Jedi and Rose. They can finally face each other properly and clearly. They wanted to try being open, but realized it wasn't what they actually wanted. Still, I am invested in the answer about where they got infected.

I like how many scenes do double-duty in this show. We see Kat back on the wagon while also learning that Tony isn't a player.

Viruses are so annoying. I like the way this plotline with Jedi and Rose wrapped.

And look at Ice also coming through.

Jean looks so good.

So many problems next week! Liu is being harassed at work. Mollie is mad at Nim. Joe is being shoved deeper into the closet. Kat and Jean come to some big moment about Alex. Goddamn.

[jamietarttownsmyheart]

idk if anyone’s said this yet but “midnight rain” by taylor swift is lowkey a colinjamie song. “he was sunshine” (colin) “i was midnight rain” (jamie)

YES YES YESSSSS OMG YES YOU GET IT

first, i wanna apologize, i took way longer answering this than i expected, real life caught up with me, but!! midnight rain and colinjamie!! you are SO correct anon.

(unrelated, you're on your own kid is a jamie song)

but back to midnight rain, i mean, im really interested in your thoughts anon! how are you interpreting it?

one way of looking at it i think could be a canon compliant au of sorts.

I was making my own name Chasing that fame He stayed the same All of me changed like midnight

like just this part? football is an escape for jamie, its a career for jamie, but its the same for colin!

but we can go deeper for both. jamie and football is complicated. for one, he loves it, he's amazing at it, he dominates, when he plays, he's jamie fucking tartt. but what is it really? he didn't grow up privileged, he didn't grow up in a stable environment. he grew up with a mom who wanted him to be happy and a father who did everything he could to make sure jamie wasn't. and its complicated because jamie playing football was what made him happy, and he wanted his mom to be proud of him. and then his dad comes back in the picture, and he wants jamie to play and jamie wants him to be proud but its a different want--its a want that one)every child has for their parent to be proud and 2)the hope that if james tartt sr is proud maybe he'll lay off.

football is something similar to colin. he loves it, but it also has brought him grief--after the team in Cardiff got relegated, he did face backlash from his family--like his grandmother for example. it also has the potential to bring more grief, as sports (and football) do tend to have a homophobic fanbase irl, and its been implied that colin is into men, and while a sexuality isnt confirmed, the implication that he is at least attracted to men is there (unless the grindr comment was incorporated as a joke, which, im hoping the writers didnt do it just for that) leading room for more pain.

there is also the third point--Jamie has the makings of being great, while Nate tells Colin that he does not. (chasing that fame/he stayed the same)

I think an au where fwb colinjamie happens pre-ted lasso's arrival is interesting, as one, it would be a secret, as both colinjamie have reasons for it to be, and two, you said midnight rain and now im thinking of the conversation of wanting to become official (albeit still secret) sort of contributing to the (he was sunshine/i was midnight rain) where they end things instead.

timeline-wise, it could be like:

jamie comes to richmond--jamiecolin fwb but end it after a month--jamie+keeley meet--rupert/rebecca divorce--ted lasso arrival.

except see, i dont want to go that route bc i dont want it to come off as keeley being the rebound. she is not. its so clear that keeley means something to jamie, and that she did when they were dating too, although jamie himself admits that while the feelinsg were real and there, he probably was not at the best mindset to act on/say the words/take accountability. that actually is true for jamie's season 1 arc--he has many moments in season 1 where you see the potential, to change, the want to change, and the way he actually does make attempts to be better. you see the softness his father tried to get rid of come out--but those moments are quickly overshadowed by jamie doubling down on "dominating" immediately after (or being sent back to man city right when he was trying and making progress and trusting--believing) because his father is very much still a heavily involved force in his life, and no one cares or knows.

so instead like. maybe theyre not fwb yet. maybe its an almost, but neither are ready to take things forward, so they stay friends-ish. maybe canon events happen as they do, but during s2, is when things get tricky.

timeline wise:

jamie comes back and is gradually accepted------jamiecolin fwb---james tartt sr----no weddings and a funeral--jamiecolin lets make it official convo but jamie asks for some time bc he wants to sift through his emotions, talk with his therapist, and give a proper response (he told keeley he loves her, and he did, he does, but that doesnt mean he's pursuing her, or wants to pursue her, he just wants her to know she meant something real, and now he wants to be able to give colin a real answer too, because he wants colin to be something real, colin is something real, he needs to know how to say it)---he loves colin omg he loves colin---tells colin----Richmond is promoted.

so all that^ but with jamie's internal monologue during his talks with his therapist its basically "he's sunshine and i'm midnight rain"

[lady-thorn]

The Dragon’s Hoard Pt. 7

Summary: The cat is out of the bag. 

Pairing: Aemond Targaryen & Ravella Whitmore (OC) 

Warnings: Angst. Unedited. ESL, please be patient. 

Word count: 6k+ 

Disclaimer: This one is much shorter (I mean, in comparison to the stuff I’ve written before). 

*** 

Hours seemed to pass, and the dragon didn’t kill her. An annoyed voice in her mind had yelled at her to shut up, and startled, Ravella obeyed. She couldn’t say if it was because she was hearing voices or that particular voice… and so powerfully rude. Looking back, she saw Vhagar was a small, formless smudge in the distance.

The bronze dragon that rescued her lowered its body to the ground in great arches, and eventually, she understood it was for her benefit. You’re cold, he said. 

Throat dry, she tried, K-King Viserys? She wobbled on her feet, bracing herself against the dragon’s black nails. 

Yes, a chuckle. You scream very loud, you know that? 

I know I scream very loud. Making noise is the purpose of screaming, she scowled up at him, and the damn man remained unfazed. Of course he did, she thought with disgust. He’s Aemond’s father. “Can you hear me if I speak up?” 

Yes. How close is Aemond? 

“Close enough I can make out Vhagar’s indistinct shape, but not see him.” 

Good. We have time to talk. The others are close, but this I needed to do alone. 

“Since when are you a skinchanger?” 

Not that. I’ll explain later. Looking around, she noticed the spot he’d picked was the same woods Vhagar had, the entrance to the Valyrian peninsula. Was that Saera? 

“Yes. Aemond has told her you want her to visit.” 

You running from him because of the childbirth vision? 

“Yes, I— how do you know about that?” she grimaced. 

Vermithor’s wings spread and closed as if Viserys were stretching out. The pregnancy or the vision? 

“BOTH!” she shouted. 

A chuckle. I can smell Aemond and you bonded in a way that is… stronger. Your smells intertwined to create something else, something that reeks of life. It could only be your child — Vhagar smells it, as well, and so does Vermithor. As for the vision, it’s part of a plot. Let’s say it wasn’t a coincidence you were attracted to the Freehold because of your nightmares. 

“So, am I in no danger?” she hated being unable to keep the hope from her voice, but she had to know. 

Childbirth is dangerous. You’re in as much danger as any other woman. But you cannot die. Aemond won’t function as needed if you do. The world of men will end with you. 

Ominous much? Ravella thought. “I… don’t want this responsibility.” 

No one in your place would. Still, it’s yours however badly you reject it. Tell me what you think of Aemond. What made you run from him? 

“He wanted me to get an abortion. I had to get away.” 

A sharp intake of air. Then it’s started, looked like he was speaking to someone else; her suspicion was confirmed when he said in an urgent tone, You must bring him back. Make him see reason. 

“Bring him back from what? Your Grace, I can’t be with Aemond right now — he isn’t himself. The Aemond I know would never want his own child murdered. Right now, I don’t trust him. He’s like a stranger… an evil twin brother I didn’t know he had.” More like the Aemond of her nightmare, a rendition of the night king. Her dead lover, planning to make her dead as well. 

That’s their plan. Drive Aemond to madness so he’ll surrender his blood to them. Only you can make break the influence they’re wielding upon him. They attacked your dreams, now they prey on his fears. 

She didn’t understand. “You mean that wasn’t Aemond’s idea?” 

No, Aemond is being manipulated. It’s something the warlocks who took Aerea do. They’ll exchange your safety for Aemond’s cooperation in their spells. 

She shivered. Recalling the hidden account of Aerea’s death by the Grand Maester who’d treated her, she didn’t need be told twice these warlocks’ spells were dangerous. She couldn’t let Aemond fall to them. “How do I do that?” 

Vermithor’s enormous head came closer, until she could smell nothing but dragonfire and charred meat. You’re at the center of his soul. It revolves around you. Only you can save him. 

She shook her head, frantic. “Your Grace, the moment he’s within touching distance, he’ll drag me back to Volantis and have a surgeon cut the baby out of me!” 

So it’s that serious. Another second he seemed to be conferring. Berry says the warlocks will start their offer by healing him of his injuries. 

“Injuries? Aemond isn’t injured. I hurled some apples and tomatoes at him, and he evaded all… but for that one which exploded upon contact with his shoulder,” she offered a sheepish grin when he laughed. “And I doubt the Volantene have hurt him. So Aemond hasn’t had a chance to have gotten injured.” 

The ones given to him in dreams. The warlocks are manipulating him as well. 

Ravella gasped. “He never said anything!” 

He didn’t want to worry you. He believes the visions come because of some mental connection he shares with the Others, and since you fear them more than anything, Aemond has tried to find a way of circumventing what he believes is a curse. The nightmare you had about the throne room was the last straw for him. The warlocks need someone like Aemond to correct the flaw in their magic, as well as keep feeding it. 

“How do they mean to do that?” 

The Valyrian way. She shivered. Blood magic, it was. 

“They are here, aren’t they?” 

Not here in this spot, but in the heart of Valyria. They need a dragonrider like Aemond… like Aerea was one. 

“So I haven’t seen her? I’ve endangered our baby for no reason?” 

You have seen her, although nobody was supposed to. Her soul is… withering. She hasn’t passed on to the other side, but after her body was burned, she could no longer be seen, unless it was by someone with great magic. Berry says that a desperate soul like hers can do things ordinary souls can’t, so this must how she was able to reach you. Only the truly sensitive can sense them. 

“I don’t have great magic, or any sort of magic. And I wouldn’t call myself truly sensitive, either.” 

Of course you do. You are a skinchanger. Aemond does, too, and because of your connection to him… The dragon circled her, a glint in the depths of his yellow-red eyes. Your soul and his in conjunction. It’s a conflagration that would put the Doom, at its peak, in shame. The warlocks must never get their hands on you. 

She circled with him, threatening to get dizzy. “What do you mean?” 

Your son, Ravella. The offspring of a Targaryen and a First Men descendant… and whatever special blood your Dayne mother carried. The baby has gifts, but since he can’t wield them right now, you’re like a vessel to them. 

Her son? She swallowed. Emotion threatened to make her knees buckle, and she couldn’t help but cover her belly, still flat and… lifeless!, with a protective hand. She couldn’t believe she and Aemond had created a life together, from their love. It was a gift, and she’d be damned if she let anyone desecrate it in any way. 

She thought of the septon and grand maester’s reports of Aerea’s death, of the torture and agony inflicted upon that poor girl… was that her son’s fate in the hands of those warlocks? To have his skin cooked from the inside out and hideous monsters crawling out of his body? 

No! 

She wouldn’t let them hurt her son, or her husband, for that matter. 

“I’ll do anything to defeat these warlocks and save Aerea, Your Grace, short of killing Aemond.” 

I know. 

The king’s approval made the dragon seem more powerful. Letting out the air, she said, “He’s here.” 

I know. I can smell Vhagar. And Aemond, too. 

“Really? What do they smell like?” 

Without a pause, he revealed, Vhagar smells of dragon — fire, smoke, charred meat and magic. Aemond smells of a dragon who’s left his cave to fly under lighting and rain, with an undertone of butterfly and silver. 

She giggled at the last words. “What do I smell like?” 

You smell of butterfly and obsidian. Now that you’re pregnant, your scent and Aemond’s are all over each other, only his now is stronger. I believe that’s the scent my grandson will carry. 

“How do you know it’s a boy?” 

Berry told me. He said— let’s wait for Aemond, the dragon shook his head. 

“What if he refuses to hear me out?” she had to be ready for all possibilities. Aemond was a smart, rational man, but threats to her made him lose his mind. 

I’ll snag you away again. 

“Good,” she smiled. 

Alicent will give him a piece of her mind. 

“I was hoping for that,” she smiled. “Is she with you?” 

Alicent is in the room with me and Helaena. Have you told Aemond about our conversation? You know which one. Not too long after their return from Castle Black, Ravella had asked Viserys to step down before a civil war broke out over the succession. She nodded. You were right. Decisions must be made. Not the ones I was hoping for, though, he said, voice contemplative. 

Throat knotted up, she stepped forward, reaching to touch the dragon’s scales — Vermithor’s uncomfortably hot in comparison to Vhagar’s — as if she were in the room with the king, ready to pat his hand. Viserys had failed the man she loved, but deep down, he wasn’t an evil man. He’d always been kind to her, though he didn’t have to. 

“I’m sorry to hear that, Your Grace. I wish things had gone the way you intended. I wouldn’t have said anything if I didn’t think it was for the best,” she said. “I know you trust your Small Council, but Lord Beesbury is the only one I believe is willing to see Princess Rhaenyra succeed you, per your will.” 

I know. You’ll be worth it. You’ve always been perceptive, Ravella. Except where Aemond is concerned. You are each other’s blind spots, you know. 

Hands on her hips, she asked, “What do you mean?” 

You were children when we realized there was much more than enmity behind your arguments. I thought it was just attraction… then I saw you kiss Aemond when he found your dog, Viserys laughed, the sound too loud for her, but it contained such joy, she found herself laughing with him, recalling she had kissed Aemond’s scarred cheek, so great her relief at having her beloved pet back, brought to her by her best worst enemy, no less. I told Alicent she could matchmake if she wanted. Then I saw you with Vhagar, and it became clear that the dragon was trying to show you what was going on in my son’s heart and soul. I don’t think it was a coincidence you spent the entire night alone the day he rescued you. Vhagar was close, standing vigil. 

“Aemond said he called and she didn’t answer, so she had to be away.” 

The boy is a fool if he believes she’d leave him alone, Viserys said, the dragon scoffing in front of her. I think she was tired of putting up with your slowness and decided to take things into her own hands. Oh, I can feel your baby through Vermithor… My grandson likes orange cake. 

“Our slowness?” she crossed her arms, challenging, but the pose didn’t last. Her son liked orange cakes, like his father did. “How is the baby? Does he… know what Aemond tried to do?” If the baby did, she’d never let Aemond know. Guilt would devour and destroy him. 

The baby is well. He was aware his mother was in trouble and trying to save them. It’s what made Vermithor find you in the middle of Volantis. He felt something was making the baby distressed, and the baby called to him. 

“It’s a boy,” she said, throat tight with emotion. She didn’t pay attention the first time the king disclosed the gender. Somehow, it didn’t seem important… but every man wanted a son, and Aemond wasn’t any different — a son who’d carry his name and… Ravella frowned. They’d discussed it. 

Unaware of her thoughts, the king repeated, A boy, the dragon’s head moving as if in a nod. At that moment, she could picture Viserys doing just that. Skinchanged by him, Vermithor looked proud. And don’t worry, the baby doesn’t know you and Aemond were arguing. He’s too little for that. About the size of your nail. 

She held out her right hand, looking down. “He’s so small,” she smiled through the tears. Later, she’d speak of this to Aemond. He’d appreciate these details, especially those about the baby’s oblivion. There would be no deterrents to their bonds, no guilt or shame or fear… 

Yes. That’s why it took Vermithor so long to locate you. The baby isn’t fully formed, so a lot of the signs he got were false. Like when you think a woman is in labor, but turns out she isn’t, he compared. When your heartbeat sped up, it could be fear, or just the thrill of Vhagar taking flight. The dragon’s face contorted, and she imagined Viserys arching a brow. Alicent asks if you are eating well or feel sick. 

“I understand,” she moved her head, wiping at her eyes. “I don’t even feel sick. And yes, I’m eating well… I’ll talk to her when we get back. And— I must inform my family.” 

Who will stand Ravella Dayne? Vermithor’s eyes rolled. 

“Grandmother will be happy,” she beamed. 

Unbearably so. She’ll want to visit. His tone indicated he wasn’t looking forward to it. 

“I miss her.” 

I know. You’ll see her soon. She’ll be in King’s Landing. 

“Really? Can you see the future?” 

Not really, but in a way, it’s a future as clear as water. Ravella the Elder will move into the Red Keep to make sure her granddaughter and unborn great-grandson are properly taken care of, and only Lady Dayne of Starfall can see to it. He laughed when she smirked at the statement. You’re the eldest, aren’t you? 

“Yes. The baby will be her first great-grandchild.” 

Here comes Aemond. Remember what you must do. Save him, then make him beg forgiveness. With that advice, Viserys faded into the background. His presence invaded her mind once more, quick, Just in case, stay closer so I can move if needed. 

Yes. She agreed, watching as Aemond jumped on the ground, a small cloud of dust rising up to his booted knees. As he strode toward her, glowering up at the dragon, sword in hand, she noticed he didn’t seem out of control anymore. It didn’t make her rest easier — there was determination still written on his face. 

“Are you hurt?” he asked, the sword held up high in the air. 

“My heart is broken.”

He exhaled. Hand held out in conciliation, he tried again, “Did Vermithor hurt you?” 

“No, he saved me before you could.” 

Aemond nodded, not commenting on the second part. He was careful as he cut off the distance between them, pausing occasionally when the dragon behind her rumbled. Curiously, Vhagar did nothing, when normally she’d have moved to protect Aemond. That’s how dragons behaved. Is Vermithor Vhagar’s offspring? 

Yes, though dragons don’t care about it as we do. Vhagar wants you to fix what’s wrong with Aemond. 

So much responsibility thrown on her lap! 

“Are you in pain? Cold?” Aemond held out her coat, then tossed it to her. “Put it on.” 

She grabbed it. Throwing it over her shoulders, she asked, “Why are you here?” 

He blinked. “Why…? What a stupid question, Ravella! A dragon showed up out of nowhere and took you away. What did you want me to do?” 

“I don’t know. You were trying to murder our baby. The dragon was trying to save him. From his own father.” 

A part of Aemond was appalled at his behavior, she could see. But another… the determined part, the one tricked by the warlocks — that one wasn’t, and for a second, Ravella worried he’d try to kill the baby. Trick her into drinking moon tea or something worse, like agreeing to give up himself and their son to the warlocks. 

Not commenting on that, Aemond crossed his arms over his chest and leaned his lower back against a tree, Vhagar coming close, crawling on the ground like a loyal dog. She made a pitiful sound, and Ravella blew her a kiss. This is the first time I hear of a dragon being seduced. This time next year, Vermithor will be thinking you hatched him, Viserys said in a dry voice. 

She pressed her lips into a firm line. “The baby’s a boy,” Aemond said, still looking cross, though his next words explained why, “I’d have preferred a girl who looks like you,” his face softened a little, but she didn’t smile. Then his face hardened. “Although it doesn’t make a difference. People like me shouldn’t be given things to love.” 

Helaena has seen a girl in your future, Viserys supplied. 

“People like you?” she crossed her arms, stepping back toward Vermithor. 

“Yes,” he straightened his back, resting against the tree, the sword forgotten; he still looked annoyed and inhuman. “I’m a possessive man.” 

“I know.” 

“I can’t lose you.” 

“I—” 

“As much as it hurts me, I can’t keep you alive. The decision is out of my hands. I can pray. I can try to find a magical solution. I can pretend that red priest didn’t foresee your death. But in the end, I can’t force you to live.” He exhaled. Almost absently, his hands went up, to the back of his head so he could undo the eyepatch. 

There was something magical about the gleaming of his sapphire under the setting sun of the old Freehold. 

“I love you, Ravella. More than anything.” He swallowed. “I can’t lose you.” 

“So the best you came up with was killing the baby you knew I wanted so desperately?” 

“In a moment of despair? Yes. People like me hold on to the things and people they love. Dragon,” he pointed to his chest. With dread, she saw his finger change direction, hover right at her chest, “Hoard. If I could, I’d go back in time and never allow you to get pregnant. It isn’t fair to the baby, I know — but I won’t pretend I love our son more than I love you. Still, I understand my actions have hurt you. If I could, I’d exchange my life for yours, but where you’re going to be in nine months is where I can’t follow. I’d gladly switch places with you, so you will have the chance to live the life you’ve always wanted. I feel like I’m killing you for giving you the baby you wanted.” 

This is what the warlocks will offer him. Your life in exchange for his. 

“You wanted one, too.” 

“Because you did. I want what you want. I’d have had children with another woman I took for wife, but that would’ve been an obligation. I never wanted to be a father. But you wanted a baby, and the only thing I want is to make you happy. Instead, I’m making you knock on death’s door.” 

“Why do you think the red priest said I’m dying in childbirth?” she asked in lieu of answering. 

“You don’t remember,” Aemond shook his head. “He called me Azor Ahai and you Nissa Nissa. Azor Ahai is to the red priests what the last hero is to the First Men.” 

“It doesn’t sound so bad. The last hero saved Westeros from the Others,” she pointed out. 

Be quiet, Ravella. This will drive him to the edge. 

“Azor Ahai murdered his wife to save the world from darkness. He plunged a sword in her breast and her soul went into the blade, making Lightbringer,” Aemond glowered. 

“Oh. Soul-giver.” 

“Soul-giver,” he gave a hard nod. “Sacrificing my wife isn’t how I’d planned to show my love. I don’t have it in me to claim to love a woman and then murder her in cold blood because the idea of having a hero for a child appeals to me. I’m not my father,” he scowled, voice dripping with derision. 

Behind her, the dragon flinched. She reached out to touch it, the King’s voice in her head, He’s right. That’s exactly what I did. Don’t feel bad. Aemond’s opinion of me is deserved. 

It must hurt. 

It does, sad laughter followed the admission. But it’s the truth, so I must take it. The day you appeared in court together after he rescued you from Ser Philip, Aemond warned me I didn’t know a lot of things about him. I found it funny, because I knew what he thought he was hiding. Even so… he was right. My children and I are strangers to each other. 

“I don’t think your father made the decision for the fun of it,” she was driven to say. 

So much for not being sensitive, Viserys scoffed. This, Ravella, is what makes you the perfect target for ghosts like Aerea. The pureness of yours calls to theirs.  

She didn’t have time to ask more, because Aemond surprised her by saying, “Me neither. Nevertheless, he made the decision of forcing child after child upon Queen Aemma. He must’ve realized she wasn’t getting stronger. One miscarriage and stillbirth after the other means something is wrong, and then he had her cut up like a pig. And he wants everyone to believe he loved her,” he snorted. 

She told me that one would be her last attempt. She wasn’t wrong, though she didn’t mean it like that. 

“Aemond—” 

Ignoring her, he said, “The obsidian ends of the staff were red like the heart of a volcano when I took it up to slay an Other. It had been a flash of light above my head, and I hadn’t paid attention, but I knew. The legend said Azor Ahai had wielded a red sword, given to him by R’hllor, forged with the blood and soul of his wife, Nissa Nissa. I believe the staff is very similar to what Lightbringer was. If Lightbringer was real, which I doubt. And I got it because of you. I’m scared out of my mind over which gifts I’ll continue to receive because of you… at the cost of your life. It isn’t worth it, Ravella. Even if I thought it was, I know it isn’t. There isn’t a world for me if you go.” 

“Lord Ryswell said we’d find each other again,” she offered. 

“Who cares about that?” Aemond spread his hands, wroth. “When he said it, I got happy because I thought we’d have many years — decades — together. Not months. I thought we’d die of old age or some disease, not because I put a baby in you.” 

“Putting a baby in me will hardly kill you.” 

Vhagar’s snout touched the back of Aemond’s head, threads of his hair flowing about in the wind of her breathing. “Losing you will.” 

She didn’t have a reply for that, because… she couldn’t think of Aemond dying. At the Nightfort, she’d run because he’d manipulated her into believing she might be pregnant, and she felt she owed it to their baby to live. But she’d known Aemond’s death would destroy her. Helaena had said as much. 

The corners of his lips lifted in a shadow of a smile when he noticed she was softening. “If you die in childbirth because of that fucking prophecy, I’ll have Vhagar burn your body, then I’ll kill myself.” 

“Aemond—” 

Sounds reasonable. 

There’s nothing reasonable about this! 

Of course there is. You’re the reason for his existence. Aemond would never waste time. Every man should make this decision when they lose their reason for living. I should’ve done it… but if I had, you wouldn’t have Aemond. 

“What about the baby?” she demanded of Aemond. Children needed parents. 

“Baby?” he blinked, unbelieving. “There’s no light in the world for me if you aren’t in it. I won’t care about the baby, not past making it the favor of putting it in mother’s care. Me? I’ll die with you. Taking my last breath will be a mercy to the child and myself.” 

Throat tightening, she choked out, “You can’t mean—” 

“I mean every word. I’ll die with you,” he rubbed at his right eye, something he did when under great duress. “So you’d better figure out a way of not dying, because your husband… and your son, too—” his lips twitched “—need you.” 

“You’re frightening me.” 

“I know. I frighten myself — nothing’s ever been so clear.” His hair came undone with the force of his running his fingers over it. “Nissa Nissa let Azor Ahai kill her. She understood it was the price he had to pay to defeat the darkness — because he loved her so much, it was a god’s price to save the world. I love you more than that,” he said, voice intense. “But I love you enough to go mad and destroy the entire world if you’re taken from me.” He stood up straighter, until he was kneeling on the ground at her feet, and though this wasn’t a godswood, but the woods at the entrance to cursed Valyria, Ravella knew he was making an unbreakable vow. 

Somehow, Aemond had gotten close enough he could touch her. “I swear, butterfly, if you die… I’ll save the world by razing it to the ground. Fires will burn and, beneath me, blood will boil. That way, the Others won’t be able to turn anyone when they come. I’ll fly until there’s nothing left to burn.” 

What should I do? Ravella asked the king. 

Not die. It isn’t Aemond’s destiny to destroy the world. 

So much for being helpful. She almost scowled. “Aemond, I can’t force myself to live.” 

“I know,” he fisted his hands. “It’s out of your hands. I’m just saying in case you came with some absurd request, like—” his voice dropped to a mocking imitation of hers, “—‘Aemond, promise me you’ll take care of the baby. You’ll raise it and find another woman to love and have many children with her.’ It won’t happen. I’ll lose my life, too. And since saving the world comes at the cost of your life, I’ll make everyone lose theirs. I just want to save the world if you’re in it. But if there’s no you…” he shook his head. “It’s over. And that’s not to say the ends I’m willing to go to, to avoid such a fate.” 

“Aemond, don’t say that,” she buried her face in her hands. “I love you, too.” 

“Do you? Even after I threatened the life of your son?” 

She nodded. “Yes. This isn’t you — it’s the warlocks who killed Aerea. They’re playing with us,” she watched as comprehension dawned on him. Caressing his cheek, she said, softly, “I don’t deny your decision to force an abortion upon me hurt me, but I understand why you did. You weren’t thinking clearly. You weren’t mine. But I still loved you then, and knew you’d find your way back to me. And you have a wrong idea of yourself. You won’t do anything to destroy the world.” 

“Die and watch from the other side, if you don’t believe me,” he tilted his head. “How long do you think it’ll take?” 

“Stop,” she shook her head, denial making her head ache. 

He lifted both hands. “It isn’t the time to speak of it. You are pregnant. Saera pointed out getting an abortion can be as dangerous as childbirth, so our hands are tied. We must—” 

She knew him, could tell what he was trying to do. “Don’t you fucking dare pull away!” she screamed. “I won’t let you go!” The smile that lit up his face was precious, and allowed her to cross the distance between them, even though she still worried. However, this was where she had to be to cut out the threads woven by the warlocks. In his arms, she confessed, “I’m afraid, too. We’ll find a solution. Besides… this,” she brought his hand to her belly, smiling at the way he held his breath, “isn’t your fault, but mine.” 

“I’m pretty sure it’s my fault. I put it there,” he pointed out with an annoyed sigh when she didn’t let him get away. 

He’s strained himself to get a baby there, Viserys supplied. 

How do you—? I won’t have this conversation with my husband’s father! 

Everyone knows. You aren’t discreet. As I said, you scream really loud, and Aemond screams louder. Ravella choked on her spit. With unhidden glee, Viserys announced, At least, you kept it confined to your quarters and empty rooms. Still, Alicent wishes the gods would take her hearing. 

“Ravella, what’s wrong?” Aemond asked, his fingers over her reddened cheeks. 

“Nothing. I— nothing,” she licked her lips. “Do you think anyone knew? What we did?” 

“Is that it?” he straightened when she confirmed. “Of course they knew it. I like making you scream.” Behind her, the dragon rumbled. Aemond offered him a curious look. “And there were all the times you complained about me picking you up and hurrying to our chambers. And the day you dreamed I was dead and fucking you, I was naked when I answered the door.” 

“You sleep naked,” she pointed out. 

“To better serve my wife, when she has need of my body in the hour of the owl,” he grinned. Then, “Butterfly, I don’t care if people know. You’re the love of my life. I want everyone to know. If I could, I’d take you up on Vhagar and—” he laughed when she screamed. “Now, you were saying the baby is your fault. I disagree, but am curious to hear your reasoning.” 

“Remember Lord Ryswell said the old gods heard my prayers and would give me what I wanted?” 

“Yes.” 

She spread her hands. “Every day, I prayed for a baby. Hence, my fault. I knew it was dangerous to have one before the long night, but… I wanted to have a family with you.” 

“I prayed for a baby, too,” he confessed, kissing her brow. “You make me the happiest man in the world. I want everything. The sun, the moon and every star in the sky, held up here,” he showed his palm. “And yet, they hold less value than you do. So I prayed to make you a mother, give you the family you yearned for.” 

She let out a breath. “I didn’t know.” 

“There was no reason to. I promised I’d do everything I could to make you happy. I’m an arrogant man, but even I admit there are things I can’t make happen. But I know how to reach out for the gods, and am not afraid of doing so. I asked them to grant me the honor of fathering your children, and they have.” His smile disappeared. “Then I tried to take it away because of some warlocks.” 

She didn’t want to be in those warlocks’ skin when Aemond got his hands on them. All the magic in the world wouldn’t save them from his fury. 

I knew the boy was a lovesick idiot. 

Be quiet and stop calling him that! 

You’re right. Viserys sighed. Aemond isn’t a boy anymore. This fine young man is a lovesick idiot. Has been for years. 

“Aemond,” she held his face between her hands, after throwing an ugly glare at the dragon. Viserys was watching them through Vermithor’s golden eyes, “do you still want me to abortion our son?” 

Aemond tilted his head. He closed his eyes, and unable to face her, said, “No. I’ve never truly wanted that. I’d have insisted on it if it were necessary. Between you and the baby, I’ll pick you. You’re everything, butterfly.” There were tears in his eyes, too — tears washed the beautiful purple one… and the sapphire as well. She wondered if the salt of them burned him. “Only, I can’t do anything to hurt you. Or our child. And yet, we need a solution.” 

A red priest came to Westeros once. Before Rhaenyra’s birth. My grandfather was called a Warrior of R’hllor, and the red priest said our line had been chosen. 

“Are you serious?” Ravella inclined her head, breaking free of Aemond’s embrace. She risked a step toward Vermithor, when her husband’s hand closed around her elbow. “Aemond, the dragon is being skinchanged.” 

*** 

Aemond arched a brow. “The baby is too young for that— You?” he asked when she shook her head. 

“Your father.” 

His first instinct was to argue, “He isn’t a warg. And let’s not talk about semantics.” Only then, he thought that shouldn’t be a priority, and pulled her behind him, holding her at his back and the sword to his right. “Who is it?” he demanded, brandishing his sword. 

The dragon merely watched them, impassive. Then, both bronze eyes rolled in a show of boredom, as the dragon settled on the ground, almost like preparing to sleep. 

“Aemond, that’s really him. I can hear his voice in my head. It’s why I didn’t run to you as soon as you landed. This is your father. He said Helaena helped him find an old scroll that allowed them to bind Vermithor to the baby.” 

Vermithor’s head gesture looked like a nod, but Aemond didn’t lower his guard. “What else did he say?” 

“That ‘the others’ are coming, but he didn’t explain his meaning. It’s getting late. I’m hungry.” 

“Vhagar is going to hunt for us.” He wouldn’t risk leaving her alone with Vermithor, even if his father was warging him, nor would he risk return to Volantis… maybe its people would kill him on the spot. He’d take measures to pay for the destruction Ravella caused in the market. 

“No. As much as I like fish, I don’t want to eat another without seasoning.” 

He grinned, though his voice was serious when he asked the dragon, “How long will you stay there?” 

For some reason, he didn’t want to think of his father knowing how badly he thought of him. Must be because, when he heard of the circumstances of Aemma Arryn’s death, he’d despaired for his mother, until Alicent calmed him down, and begged him to not misjudge his father. His mother did that a lot — protect a man who didn’t deserve her loyalty. 

But then, so does Ravella, he thought, self-hatred making him want to throw up. 

“He says he doesn’t know. His control has improved over the days he spent training with Berry.” She inclined her head. “Your father wants me to tell you what he knows of the red priests. Every time a Targaryen king ascends, one is dispatched to King’s Landing. They want to anoint the king as Azor Ahai reborn. They went to Aegon, Jaehaerys and your father. All three turned them down.” 

Of course they do, Aemond thought, sarcastic. The red priests courting his family made sense, and begrudgingly, he felt an ounce of respect for his father — the servants of the Lord of Light would be like plagues upon Westeros, burning every sept and weirwood on their way, using human sacrifice to call out to their god. Having a dragonrider consent to spread their religion would be the greatest validation those zealots would ever reach and— 

Ignoring his thoughts, Ravella was saying, “They said Blackfyre was Lightbringer, and with the blessing of a red priest, any Targaryen who wielded it would be able to— Aemond?” Ravella asked when he staggered. He looked ahead, face-to-face with Vermithor. “What? I don’t understand! What does he get? Aemond!” she thought to keep him up, but he fell on all fours. 

He swallowed. Red flashing in the sky above him, coloring the world at large until he felt, for a blink, he was staring at pools of lava, the enemy across the room, ready to march forward and wreak as much destruction as it could. Legend said Lightbringer burned red in battle, like… Lightbringer was a sword, not a staff. But… His thoughts were frantic, disordered, and Aemond felt faint. 

“Help him!” he heard Ravella scream at Vermithor. “Aemond, stay with me!” 

He laughed weakly when the dragon blew hot air at him, as if it might help. “Lightbringer, Ravella,” he caressed her face. “I have Lightbringer. The staff you gave me.” Azor Ahai had forged the blade, tempered it with his wife’s blood, imprisoning her soul… at a god’s behest. 

Oh the irony. Had Ravella set her own death in motion? Had he, when he took her to the Isle of Faces, where the children of the forest had changed the weapon so Aemond could kill the Others? 

Ashen-faced, Ravella fell against him. “Gods, Aemond… Berry says the Prince that was Promised will come from your line,” she said in a breathy voice.

[sohmiya]

More hcs cause I promised <3

Crushing stage:

I couldn’t get over Miko and Ev casually bumping into each other at a coffee shop, so I feel like it’s part of their crushing stage relationship now and bc Ev’s a hopeless romantic, I imagine him coming back from like a South American tour with completely different timezones yet he’s still adamant on seeing Miko the morning after.

Like he’ll be walking there, dressed down, all tired, on the phone to Cypress and Cy would go “Evren, why are you awake? You came back from tour yesterday” “I’m going to buy coffee” “…you have a coffee maker and a kettle” “yeah but…I get to see Miko at the cafe” and Cy would just go “oh” “oh? what do you mean oh?!” “no, I mean, it’s just nice you being like this” bc atp Cy would realise that he really likes her and Ev would say “hm, yep, sleep deprivation is such a hot look”

I see Ev and Miko sitting together, like at the same table and everything and they’d be talking, and Evren would say something like “you really didn’t know who I was when we met?” and Miko would shake her head like “not a clue. does that disappoint you?” and Ev would say “no, definitely not. it makes me like you more, actually” but I still see Ev being less confident than usual when he says that so Miko would tease him and say “ohh, you like me? :)”

Evren has a group chat with his band too and they’d definitely say stuff like ‘is this like just a thing or are you wanting to have a relationship with her?’ ‘you’re really falling for her, huh?’ and ‘as long as she doesn’t break your heart and we get good songs out of it, I’m fine with it’—bc they know how Evren can get when it comes to relationships.

And even though Ev knows he’s crushing, he’d definitely wonder ‘do I only feel like this because I think she’s pretty?” and then he’ll be at Miko’s practices, and then he’d hear her laugh at something and find himself smiling and realise it’s definitely not a ‘I’m just attracted to you’ kind of thing.

Relationship stage:

I imagine Evren being on some talk show like promoting his album and stuff and the host is all “your girlfriend is in the crowd, right?” “yeah, so if you see me looking around for her frantically it’s because I’m feeling nervous”

Him wearing Sanada jerseys to Miko’s games <3 which does a great job at confirming their relationship to the world.

But alsoo Ev having Miko’s social media notifications on for when she posts so he can like and comment on everything and his comments are emojis or stuff like ‘hot’ ‘you’re wearing my necklace’ ’if you wanna get married i’m down’ ‘thinking inappropriate thoughts ;)’

I also see Miko and Ev being around with Javier and Rosalie and they ask how Javier proposed, and Rosa would laugh and say “we were at home, he gets down on one knee, asks me to marry him and then flew abroad the next day to play a match” and Ev would roll his eyes and say “mom, that’s terrible. you need more romantic men in your life…unless you and dad are planning to get back together, hint hint, then forget I said anything :)”

each day i get sadder that evren does not exist 🕳️🚶🏻‍♀️

“yeah but…I get to see Miko at the cafe”

PLEASE evren always trying to show up at the cafe at times that miko is most likely there 😩😩😩 miko will 100% tease him at one point: “are you stalking me?” and when they’re about to part ways miko says “have a good day” and he replies with “it already is” UNGHHHH

alsooo !!!!!! CYPRESS LOWKEY BEING A EVREN MIKO SHIPPER AS HE SHOULD

“you really didn’t know who I was when we met?”

the way i knew he would eventually bring this up SHSHAJSJA and yes miko would 100% be a tease about like “what if i told you that my first thought was that you’re just a nepo baby? you’d still like me?” and i imagine evren saying something like “uhuh. you’re cute so i’ll let that slide” 🤭🥰🥰

‘as long as she doesn’t break your heart and we get good songs out of it, I’m fine with it’

LISTEN not to insert maxine but this is one of the conversations that second coming exactly had with her 😭

he’d hear her laugh at something and find himself smiling and realise it’s definitely not a ‘I’m just attracted to you’ kind of thing.

alsoooo this hc is actually perfect for miko because i always imagined her having a melodious laugh shsakdkak but she tends to cackle a lot LMAO so like when she starts deeply crushing on evren she’ll be so self-conscious about it and at one point she starts covering her mouth and idk why but i can 100% imagine evren saying “don’t do that” and miko just going “what?” “that” then he points at her hand just hovering over her mouth then proceeds to compliment her smile or how he likes to sound of her laugh 😭😭😭😭😭😭

“yeah, so if you see me looking around for her frantically it’s because I’m feeling nervous”

STOP I LOVE HIM :(((( miko would tell him beforehand where she’d be in the crowd during the interview then she’d say “but just in case you still don’t find me, just know i’m there” and i think miko would take a picture of the stage from her seat before the show starts and send it to him so he can kind of estimate the angle of the camera or something and have an idea which part of the crowd to search for her hehehe but yeah after every interview miko always tells him “i’m so proud of you” <333333

Him wearing Sanada jerseys to Miko’s games <3 which does a great job at confirming their relationship to the world.

I CAN SEE THIS TAKING OVER HEADLINES like miko would make a lighthearted comment about how “nobody even cares that we won. they’re just talking about us” and evren just chuckles like “sorry babe i couldn’t resist” or if he’s feeling cocky he’d be like “you’re dating me. everyone knows you won” 😭

evren having miko’s post notifs on reminded me of this:

JDHSHSJ but i just know evren’s the kind of bf who would comment “first” or “mine” and when he comments “thinking inappropriate thoughts” miko jokingly says “you are so shameless” but in the comments she’d go along with it to drive the fans crazy and reply to evren “show me 😏” like i just know they’re in the same room sitting next to each other just laughing when the fans swarm the replies 😭😭😭

“we were at home, he gets down on one knee, asks me to marry him and then flew abroad the next day to play a match”

the way miko would literally look at javier all surprised like “you did NOT” and javier’s just 🤦‍♂️ SHSJSKSK also i think after that miko’s admiration for rosalie would skyrocket simply for her ability to make javier aka *THE* manager of inter city look like he’s Just Some Guy shdjsfhshdjsjsjsjs but miko would also just sit there in silence taking in the moment and feeling so soft and happy for evren

and like obviously she would never interfere in their family matters but when it’s just her and evren and they’re both in their feelings she’ll most likely blurt out something like “i want what your parents have” before she realizes they’re divorced and like she’s stuttering out an apology and how that’s not what she meant but evren just laughs and is like “no no i get it. i do too” and like not to push my evren x miko endgame agenda but in my head evren’s looking at her lovingly then he continues “and i think i found it” shhwjeajwhjwaj BYEEEEEEEEEE